it's been a few days, i was really fumed on thurs night. Angry. i was so pissed with him. Perhaps it was because i was not used to him not obeying me. or was i simply not used to him standing up for himself?
oh well. it's true actually, that he dun owe me anything. cos i did all those things on my own will. ha ha. oh well...not saying that what i've pointed out on thurs were wrong, they were probably rather emotive, but the contents were pretty much factual. I do think that he is a self centered person. Just that, i have to admit here that everyone's self centered to a certain extent, wanting to achieve and being well liked and recognised might be his way of exerting self importance and gaining self confidence which...sometimes tend to give people the feeling that he's overly self centered. But honestly, who doesnt want to be well liked and who's not ambitious? I can't fault him for being extra-ordinary, more outstanding and clear minded than others can i? ha ha. it's my fault again? nope, it's nobody's fault or in another word, it's everyone's fault.
It's kind of funny how, i am always the one who encouraged him to stand up for himself, stop tolerating, stop "ren" things. And he did, first by not "ren" me...haha...retribution? oh well...of course my first reaction is anger, what could anyone imagined me to do? sit there and smile? nope, it's not me. But like what ian have said, there's this duality of character in me, this alterego, and yeah, one of me will react immediately, rash and without thinking, usually end up in awkward situations because i behaved unreasonably. Then the reasonable mo comes in later, and re-analyse the whoe issue/situation/event/incident and then will usually decide to apologise. And she will do it, one good thing about me is that i am thick skinned. One of the rare good traits?? oh well. and i really do tend to apologise even when im not completely wrong.
take for the ian's thing, i knew i was the one being wrong...like say 90%. so naturally i have to apologise. But for this jiayi's case, im at most 40% wrong...but i still felt like doing something. ha ha...only that this time, i dun feel like apologising but rather leaving the problem alone, which means i wont get pissed with it anymore. ha ha. hope i can do it.
wahhhhh
im gona get the momentum...busy busy...
10 days to coursework deadline
6days to GP prelim
36 days to GP Alevel
42 days to SAT exam...wahhhhhhhh
