sometimes, even when one has a clear mind of what to do, what to be achieved, what to be planned ahead, they will still end up not being able to complete task planned.
It is what happened to me today.
I planned to do at least 4 final prints by today, and i ended up doing nothing but crying. Silly siah? i actually ponned the whole day, the whole day, to do art and because of the inefficiency of the art teachers i ended up doing nothing today. Holy shit, then i was at one point so angry with mr lee that i dashed down the stairs like a ghost and heard from xinni that i freaked out jianhao, well, sorry then but...not my fault...i was really really super depressed. anyway...then i went into darkrm to take my file, still with the "hell pissed" face, and then all of them were shocked to see me, and ms chan actually asked" what's wrong wang mo?" (think they were having exco meeting), i totally ignored her. i was realli pissed.
ms lu is simply very biased and self centered, she's the ultimate kind, everyday rushes off to do her own things, not committed to be tcher at all,yeah, she's here only because she has to serve her 6 yrs bond.
ms chan is much nicer, more caring, but sometimes, she thinks to simply, she thinks that i cried because i was stressed. NO! i cried because i felt that it is unfair!
mr lee is juz a fat guy who can be rather funny at times but altogether a big lazy ass who's hard to catch and hard to argue with and hard to deal with and hard to work with and...gosh...im gona cry again...
and hate shen jiayi...he juz walked past like nothing's happened while i was crying like hell juz now.
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Saturday, August 25, 2007
am i wrong? forget it.
it's been a few days, i was really fumed on thurs night. Angry. i was so pissed with him. Perhaps it was because i was not used to him not obeying me. or was i simply not used to him standing up for himself?
oh well. it's true actually, that he dun owe me anything. cos i did all those things on my own will. ha ha. oh well...not saying that what i've pointed out on thurs were wrong, they were probably rather emotive, but the contents were pretty much factual. I do think that he is a self centered person. Just that, i have to admit here that everyone's self centered to a certain extent, wanting to achieve and being well liked and recognised might be his way of exerting self importance and gaining self confidence which...sometimes tend to give people the feeling that he's overly self centered. But honestly, who doesnt want to be well liked and who's not ambitious? I can't fault him for being extra-ordinary, more outstanding and clear minded than others can i? ha ha. it's my fault again? nope, it's nobody's fault or in another word, it's everyone's fault.
It's kind of funny how, i am always the one who encouraged him to stand up for himself, stop tolerating, stop "ren" things. And he did, first by not "ren" me...haha...retribution? oh well...of course my first reaction is anger, what could anyone imagined me to do? sit there and smile? nope, it's not me. But like what ian have said, there's this duality of character in me, this alterego, and yeah, one of me will react immediately, rash and without thinking, usually end up in awkward situations because i behaved unreasonably. Then the reasonable mo comes in later, and re-analyse the whoe issue/situation/event/incident and then will usually decide to apologise. And she will do it, one good thing about me is that i am thick skinned. One of the rare good traits?? oh well. and i really do tend to apologise even when im not completely wrong.
take for the ian's thing, i knew i was the one being wrong...like say 90%. so naturally i have to apologise. But for this jiayi's case, im at most 40% wrong...but i still felt like doing something. ha ha...only that this time, i dun feel like apologising but rather leaving the problem alone, which means i wont get pissed with it anymore. ha ha. hope i can do it.
wahhhhh
im gona get the momentum...busy busy...
10 days to coursework deadline
6days to GP prelim
36 days to GP Alevel
42 days to SAT exam...wahhhhhhhh
oh well. it's true actually, that he dun owe me anything. cos i did all those things on my own will. ha ha. oh well...not saying that what i've pointed out on thurs were wrong, they were probably rather emotive, but the contents were pretty much factual. I do think that he is a self centered person. Just that, i have to admit here that everyone's self centered to a certain extent, wanting to achieve and being well liked and recognised might be his way of exerting self importance and gaining self confidence which...sometimes tend to give people the feeling that he's overly self centered. But honestly, who doesnt want to be well liked and who's not ambitious? I can't fault him for being extra-ordinary, more outstanding and clear minded than others can i? ha ha. it's my fault again? nope, it's nobody's fault or in another word, it's everyone's fault.
It's kind of funny how, i am always the one who encouraged him to stand up for himself, stop tolerating, stop "ren" things. And he did, first by not "ren" me...haha...retribution? oh well...of course my first reaction is anger, what could anyone imagined me to do? sit there and smile? nope, it's not me. But like what ian have said, there's this duality of character in me, this alterego, and yeah, one of me will react immediately, rash and without thinking, usually end up in awkward situations because i behaved unreasonably. Then the reasonable mo comes in later, and re-analyse the whoe issue/situation/event/incident and then will usually decide to apologise. And she will do it, one good thing about me is that i am thick skinned. One of the rare good traits?? oh well. and i really do tend to apologise even when im not completely wrong.
take for the ian's thing, i knew i was the one being wrong...like say 90%. so naturally i have to apologise. But for this jiayi's case, im at most 40% wrong...but i still felt like doing something. ha ha...only that this time, i dun feel like apologising but rather leaving the problem alone, which means i wont get pissed with it anymore. ha ha. hope i can do it.
wahhhhh
im gona get the momentum...busy busy...
10 days to coursework deadline
6days to GP prelim
36 days to GP Alevel
42 days to SAT exam...wahhhhhhhh
Friday, August 24, 2007
You dun owe me anything?
it is directed at me. i know. He's directing at me when he put "and mind u, treat others with respect as u would want them to treat u, and pls, i dun owe u anything" as his personal msg.
So you dun owe anything? yes, those presents were simply because i wanted to give you. Those care and concerns were simply because i like you and i wana give to you. SO u dun owe me anything. yes you dun u bastard. All these were because i am being "jian". it's my own fault.
Have you ever respected me? no you never did. You think it's call respect when you constantly ask me to help you straighten out problems between you and other girls? you think i have the freaking time to help you do all these when my coursework deadline is 11 days away, 7 days to my prelims and 37 days to my Alevel???
You. Better. Fuck. Off.
Shenjiayi. You used to be the best kind of guy i've ever seen but as time goes by, you emerged as one of the worse. Fuck off. i wonder when i will really tear your freaky fake and pretentious mask right in front of everybody. you are just lucky that you got the president post, if not for me who constantly persuaded other excos, if not for my vote, you think you could beat gq? mind you, you only had 1 vote during the 1st and 2nd round of votings. mind you, you did not come for more than 50% of the exco meetings and activities, mind you, you are only up here because you sucked up to teachers, mind you, you are as self centered as what you've said abt gq and yk. mind you, you are not even worth to be pitied. mind you, you juz suck. Stop taking my love and care and concerns for granted for you have no more chance, i would not give you anymore chance. fuck off. It's over between you and i, my infatuation has stopped and you are just like a piece of shit in my eyes now. Understand? a piece of shit.
So you dun owe anything? yes, those presents were simply because i wanted to give you. Those care and concerns were simply because i like you and i wana give to you. SO u dun owe me anything. yes you dun u bastard. All these were because i am being "jian". it's my own fault.
Have you ever respected me? no you never did. You think it's call respect when you constantly ask me to help you straighten out problems between you and other girls? you think i have the freaking time to help you do all these when my coursework deadline is 11 days away, 7 days to my prelims and 37 days to my Alevel???
You. Better. Fuck. Off.
Shenjiayi. You used to be the best kind of guy i've ever seen but as time goes by, you emerged as one of the worse. Fuck off. i wonder when i will really tear your freaky fake and pretentious mask right in front of everybody. you are just lucky that you got the president post, if not for me who constantly persuaded other excos, if not for my vote, you think you could beat gq? mind you, you only had 1 vote during the 1st and 2nd round of votings. mind you, you did not come for more than 50% of the exco meetings and activities, mind you, you are only up here because you sucked up to teachers, mind you, you are as self centered as what you've said abt gq and yk. mind you, you are not even worth to be pitied. mind you, you juz suck. Stop taking my love and care and concerns for granted for you have no more chance, i would not give you anymore chance. fuck off. It's over between you and i, my infatuation has stopped and you are just like a piece of shit in my eyes now. Understand? a piece of shit.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
HE SCREWED UP MY LIFE..AND I WONT LET HIM SCREW IT FURTHER!
Today i went to school and slacked. Early in the morning, tot i was going to be late but i wasnt. And then went to art room and to my SURPRISE it is locked. So i got damn hell pissed off, and i went down to the atrium, thr. the stairs at the fountain, anyway, i looked super pissed. And then met mrs nair at the line, she's quite amused by my "email" on sat. night.
Went to take blue slip with Mrs Nair, and then to my suayness, we met sharon phua. She's such a bitch! she started questioning me about why am i taking the blue slip and things like that, and kind of embarrassed mrs nair in front of her, so lack of respect of her colleagues. sighz...she deserved to be hanged.
Anyway...after that female beast was gone, mrs nair happily signed the blue slip and let me go, then i went for pe, it was damn fun, i love handball:).
Then had art...was really frustrated with it, saw jy, and passed him my written "2nd wish"...we chatted quite happily at first, then we reached a point where he says that he can't sign the thing because he cant make sure that he wont fall sick, and wad the hell! and then after a while, i felt really weird, so i went into the darkroom and asked the rest of the ppl to get out and talked to him individually. I was serious, i was almost going to cry la. I asked him, why that we've been friends for so long and that he still doesnt understand me? why that he cant even just be a little less serious about things,i asked him why he dun wana sign. He said he think that such things are not necessary. so...if things that i deem necessary are unnecessary to you, then i really wonder why can are still friends. it's funny. so i laughed, and went out, and got duper pissed and sad...so i went to ceramics, and then cried and cried...i was so pissed with myself.
i knew he is selfish and self centered to a large extent, but i tot, after i've done so much for him, at least he might reciprocate a bit..like..say...if im always crazy, coming out with mad ideas, and if he's always sensible and serious, why cant he just be "crazy" for once and agree with my crazy idea for once juz to...simply make me feel happy for once???cant he see that im in such a bad mood these days? as a friend, he has not contributed anything towards this friendshipt, why am i obliged to be the one who's always pumping in for this friendship? if it's so hard to sustain, if it's so hard for him just to think for me a little more, then i guess i have nothing more to say. it's the end then. He fucked his way thr. he sucked his way up to the teachers, and he's damn hell well-liked and yeah, of course he doesnt need me to care for him, he's such a superb person, then why the hell am i doing all these? go and die la.
anyway, next time, in future, it will mean that, "got jy no wang mo, got wang mo no jy" over my dead body man!!!
I. HATE. SHEN. JIAYI.
Went to take blue slip with Mrs Nair, and then to my suayness, we met sharon phua. She's such a bitch! she started questioning me about why am i taking the blue slip and things like that, and kind of embarrassed mrs nair in front of her, so lack of respect of her colleagues. sighz...she deserved to be hanged.
Anyway...after that female beast was gone, mrs nair happily signed the blue slip and let me go, then i went for pe, it was damn fun, i love handball:).
Then had art...was really frustrated with it, saw jy, and passed him my written "2nd wish"...we chatted quite happily at first, then we reached a point where he says that he can't sign the thing because he cant make sure that he wont fall sick, and wad the hell! and then after a while, i felt really weird, so i went into the darkroom and asked the rest of the ppl to get out and talked to him individually. I was serious, i was almost going to cry la. I asked him, why that we've been friends for so long and that he still doesnt understand me? why that he cant even just be a little less serious about things,i asked him why he dun wana sign. He said he think that such things are not necessary. so...if things that i deem necessary are unnecessary to you, then i really wonder why can are still friends. it's funny. so i laughed, and went out, and got duper pissed and sad...so i went to ceramics, and then cried and cried...i was so pissed with myself.
i knew he is selfish and self centered to a large extent, but i tot, after i've done so much for him, at least he might reciprocate a bit..like..say...if im always crazy, coming out with mad ideas, and if he's always sensible and serious, why cant he just be "crazy" for once and agree with my crazy idea for once juz to...simply make me feel happy for once???cant he see that im in such a bad mood these days? as a friend, he has not contributed anything towards this friendshipt, why am i obliged to be the one who's always pumping in for this friendship? if it's so hard to sustain, if it's so hard for him just to think for me a little more, then i guess i have nothing more to say. it's the end then. He fucked his way thr. he sucked his way up to the teachers, and he's damn hell well-liked and yeah, of course he doesnt need me to care for him, he's such a superb person, then why the hell am i doing all these? go and die la.
anyway, next time, in future, it will mean that, "got jy no wang mo, got wang mo no jy" over my dead body man!!!
I. HATE. SHEN. JIAYI.
Monday, August 20, 2007
MSN life without Shenjiayi--Day7
Sunday is a day where people rest. it's bad, i have conflict with the woman who gave birth to me again. for some stupid reason.
and i did SAT papers, did int. hist, did my personal reference, i am almost shamed t death man. Im really not used to boast about myself this way...
let me see what i have to do this weekend
1) Personal Reference
2) International History SBQ
3) International History essay outline
4) International History, Japanese economic miracle essay (over reliance on foreign market part)
5) Revise Southeast Asia Hist, ASEAN during the post 1975 period for SBQ test on monday
6) Art..complete 7 final images
7) Do SAT paper 2
hmm...so i did..1,4 and 7, and abit of 6 and a bit of 2...okiee....
and i did SAT papers, did int. hist, did my personal reference, i am almost shamed t death man. Im really not used to boast about myself this way...
let me see what i have to do this weekend
1) Personal Reference
2) International History SBQ
3) International History essay outline
4) International History, Japanese economic miracle essay (over reliance on foreign market part)
5) Revise Southeast Asia Hist, ASEAN during the post 1975 period for SBQ test on monday
6) Art..complete 7 final images
7) Do SAT paper 2
hmm...so i did..1,4 and 7, and abit of 6 and a bit of 2...okiee....
Sunday, August 19, 2007
I. Talked. To. Him.
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
my second wish:
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
erm?
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
must do
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
MUST DO
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
u noe the requirements(:
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
yes.
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
my second wish: Take care of yourself, do not fall SICK. Don't die. DON'T.
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
huh?
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
why u suddenly say this?
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
never mind
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
promise?
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
yeah
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
i won't die wad
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
u ok?
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
yeah.
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
Thanks. Remeber my second wish.
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
yeah
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
thanks.
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
take care.
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
is there any reason why u are saying this?
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
i just dun want you to die///
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
haha, yeah
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
i promise u i won't(:
mo says:
if i died
mo says:
then u still have to keep the promise.
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
ooi
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
dun say such things
mo says:
promise?
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
u are not going to die
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
neither am i going going to
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
going yo*
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
dun any how think
mo says:
promise?
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
i will
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
but u are not going to die
mo says:
wait, i want to add on to the wish
mo says:
can?
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
err
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
k
mo says:
you must also make sure that
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
that?
mo says:
erm
mo says:
you will be happy and successful in future
mo says:
can?
mo says:
promise?
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
yeah
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
can
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
are u seriously alright?
mo says:
you think im crazy?
mo says:
no im not.
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
nono
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
i noe u are not crazy
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
i am just asking if u are feeling alright?
mo says:
so you promised.
mo says:
thanks
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
yup
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
(:
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
take care
Because...if im really going to die, the person whom im really worried for is him. He's such a 工作狂..i duno, he used to be very busy, is very busy now and will be very busy in future i guess. and thus he tends to neglect his health. Like skipping breakfast, lunch or dinner or...sleeping late, and over exhausting himself. i want him to be healthy, so i spend the second wish on that. i will not regret abt it.
my second wish:
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
erm?
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
must do
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
MUST DO
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
u noe the requirements(:
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
yes.
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
my second wish: Take care of yourself, do not fall SICK. Don't die. DON'T.
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
huh?
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
why u suddenly say this?
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
never mind
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
promise?
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
yeah
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
i won't die wad
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
u ok?
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
yeah.
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
Thanks. Remeber my second wish.
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
yeah
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
thanks.
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
take care.
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
is there any reason why u are saying this?
mo: Everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time. says:
i just dun want you to die///
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
haha, yeah
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
i promise u i won't(:
mo says:
if i died
mo says:
then u still have to keep the promise.
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
ooi
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
dun say such things
mo says:
promise?
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
u are not going to die
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
neither am i going going to
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
going yo*
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
dun any how think
mo says:
promise?
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
i will
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
but u are not going to die
mo says:
wait, i want to add on to the wish
mo says:
can?
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
err
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
k
mo says:
you must also make sure that
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
that?
mo says:
erm
mo says:
you will be happy and successful in future
mo says:
can?
mo says:
promise?
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
yeah
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
can
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
are u seriously alright?
mo says:
you think im crazy?
mo says:
no im not.
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
nono
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
i noe u are not crazy
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
i am just asking if u are feeling alright?
mo says:
so you promised.
mo says:
thanks
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
yup
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
(:
[jiayi] only dead or lazy fish swim with the stream says:
take care
Because...if im really going to die, the person whom im really worried for is him. He's such a 工作狂..i duno, he used to be very busy, is very busy now and will be very busy in future i guess. and thus he tends to neglect his health. Like skipping breakfast, lunch or dinner or...sleeping late, and over exhausting himself. i want him to be healthy, so i spend the second wish on that. i will not regret abt it.
MSN Life without Shenjiayi---Day6 (death is not far away...i realised)
Today is funny. My parents can't wait for me to go for the body screening. SO i went there early in the morning. Really early, and i din eat breakfast T.T...cos mum said shld not eat anything, might affect the result,she's juz refusing to believe the truth. Trying to think that the last test is inaccurate? i doubt it. Anyway, im not afraid, so what...everyone's destined to die, it's just a matter of time, some live to a longer life while some live to a shorter life. No big deal, i kept on asking myself, what if i were to die tmr, will i have any regrets? will i miss anyone or anything on this Earth? and the ans is kind of pathetic. sighz...
The process was cool...i went into the room, and the nurse rubbed and did all the work in a super skilled manner, i did not feel any pain...in a split second and then it's done. how amazing. but the later part is kind of messy...because, my blood cant seem to stop...weird? weird. oops...may be there's really something wrong with me, the nurse looked at me in a weird way. so what...
Then went to the doc, he listened to my heart, before that, he asked if i have any health problem...and i told him NO. im not sure why i emphasized on the NO. may be deep inside, im also refusing to admit the truth? may be i also rather believe im healthy. actually i am, why shld i say i have problem when im perfectly ok right now? who knows...i hate doctors...they might be bluffing me. i still can run, can talk, can do analytical thinking, can.....do a lot of things!...and im gd at table tennis, badminton, soccer, handball, tennis, iceskating, rollerblading...many things! how can i be having any bloody problem??? it must be a mistake.
oh...went to tale x-ray too...checking for wad? duno..and urine...and brain thingy...juz you lie down and then they'move' you into this machine thingy...duno...have to change onto their purple thingy...look like sleeping gown:P...or jap clothes...wadever...i din do those the previous time. ha ha...may be this time they'll tell me i have brain cancer! ha ha...wadever...wadever the case, im not gona stay in hospital...not gona wait to die...
oh........how i hope tmr never comes.....
i need time...i still have many things not done...what if...i die before i could tell him i love him??? shit shit...duno why...my life is turning into an obvious cliche..like a Korean TV drama....sighz...serects are meant to be buried??? 也许这个"我爱你"的秘密真的会随我长眠于地下也说不定呢。。。
死亡。。很可怕吗？
The process was cool...i went into the room, and the nurse rubbed and did all the work in a super skilled manner, i did not feel any pain...in a split second and then it's done. how amazing. but the later part is kind of messy...because, my blood cant seem to stop...weird? weird. oops...may be there's really something wrong with me, the nurse looked at me in a weird way. so what...
Then went to the doc, he listened to my heart, before that, he asked if i have any health problem...and i told him NO. im not sure why i emphasized on the NO. may be deep inside, im also refusing to admit the truth? may be i also rather believe im healthy. actually i am, why shld i say i have problem when im perfectly ok right now? who knows...i hate doctors...they might be bluffing me. i still can run, can talk, can do analytical thinking, can.....do a lot of things!...and im gd at table tennis, badminton, soccer, handball, tennis, iceskating, rollerblading...many things! how can i be having any bloody problem??? it must be a mistake.
oh...went to tale x-ray too...checking for wad? duno..and urine...and brain thingy...juz you lie down and then they'move' you into this machine thingy...duno...have to change onto their purple thingy...look like sleeping gown:P...or jap clothes...wadever...i din do those the previous time. ha ha...may be this time they'll tell me i have brain cancer! ha ha...wadever...wadever the case, im not gona stay in hospital...not gona wait to die...
oh........how i hope tmr never comes.....
i need time...i still have many things not done...what if...i die before i could tell him i love him??? shit shit...duno why...my life is turning into an obvious cliche..like a Korean TV drama....sighz...serects are meant to be buried??? 也许这个"我爱你"的秘密真的会随我长眠于地下也说不定呢。。。
死亡。。很可怕吗？
Saturday, August 18, 2007
MSN life without Shenjiayi--Day5
Friday...it rained heavily. Felt cold...colder than usual....
Had Math, and realised that im really behind. I havent done my math revision works for Integration, Correlation and Regression, Binomial distribution, approximate binomial distribution...and today we have one more, normal distribution. Guess i really have to brush up...but...i brought all the works back home only to realise that i did not bring GC home. Wad to do now? bring all back to sch?
Art was slack as usual, i tried to print on acrylic mixed with water. Failed. Tried poster colour. Failed. Tried watercolour...result inconsistent...sighz. I think im so dead for my coursework
Hist...totally confused...i need to go and mug on econs theory and arrange my notes...but...where's the time???? how i hope that time can stop here for me and allow me to catch up first...the world and everyone else around me are moving too fast.
went back to DHS to take my olevel prep...mrs goh sounds a bit reluctant..haha...she said with all our prep works gone, she'll be left with nothing to show..oh well...and on the way back to nj, made jy to fetch me at the side gate to help me carry the boards. ha ha. making full use of human resources.
met cheryl and jy at 430, it's jy who wanted to talk to her, but he kind of scared that she will not want to talk to him so he made sure i will be there too. and true enough, when cheryl received my sms abt meeting jy, she din go until i had to sms her again...sighz...im trying to give them chance..it's funny that i can still feel happy...oh well..as long as he's happy, i will be happy too. He's very eager to see her, really, and always cheryl here and cheryl there, but then once when she's there alr. he stopd talking..ha ha...haiz...humans...
anyway...this call thing is really making all of us very concerned...im starting to get interested in guessing who will be the nxt victim...will it be kaiting? amalina? or...oh well..the person seems to know who to call lehz...the more prominent ones in the club...
Had Math, and realised that im really behind. I havent done my math revision works for Integration, Correlation and Regression, Binomial distribution, approximate binomial distribution...and today we have one more, normal distribution. Guess i really have to brush up...but...i brought all the works back home only to realise that i did not bring GC home. Wad to do now? bring all back to sch?
Art was slack as usual, i tried to print on acrylic mixed with water. Failed. Tried poster colour. Failed. Tried watercolour...result inconsistent...sighz. I think im so dead for my coursework
Hist...totally confused...i need to go and mug on econs theory and arrange my notes...but...where's the time???? how i hope that time can stop here for me and allow me to catch up first...the world and everyone else around me are moving too fast.
went back to DHS to take my olevel prep...mrs goh sounds a bit reluctant..haha...she said with all our prep works gone, she'll be left with nothing to show..oh well...and on the way back to nj, made jy to fetch me at the side gate to help me carry the boards. ha ha. making full use of human resources.
met cheryl and jy at 430, it's jy who wanted to talk to her, but he kind of scared that she will not want to talk to him so he made sure i will be there too. and true enough, when cheryl received my sms abt meeting jy, she din go until i had to sms her again...sighz...im trying to give them chance..it's funny that i can still feel happy...oh well..as long as he's happy, i will be happy too. He's very eager to see her, really, and always cheryl here and cheryl there, but then once when she's there alr. he stopd talking..ha ha...haiz...humans...
anyway...this call thing is really making all of us very concerned...im starting to get interested in guessing who will be the nxt victim...will it be kaiting? amalina? or...oh well..the person seems to know who to call lehz...the more prominent ones in the club...
Friday, August 17, 2007
calls...........
Today felt very very tired....
Had whitby's lesson, practical criticism of poems, compare and contrast again. I dun really quite understand them, and one part of the poem has really sexual indications...yuck...i was not very attentive, worrying about the heavy clouds outsides thr.out the lesson, i dun want it to rain, wana have pe. Guess whitby is pissed.
Bad luck, it started pouring when the bell rang. sighz, pe was cancelled, so went to eat, was expecting to see him there in the canteen, he always eat there at around the 2nd period cos it's his free period. But then...i din see him today....
Int. hist..went thr. china's emergence...ark...have to do essay outline for Japan industrial miracle...sighz...heavy contents...
GC..mrs nair looked thr. my cca achievements...okay...can upload on km le.
lunch, went down to canteen to accompany karen ear her lunch, and surprise surprise, saw him eating in the canteen, said "hi" and nothing else.
went to do art during free period...nothing much was done, fell asleep and...sighz...damn tired and slapped myself to wake up. then cancelled math tuition with jensen, cos really tired.
math...sat on the stairs waiting for mr tsang to arrive, and then saw jy walking by...we both said nothing, probably he din see me. Had math, fell asleep in the middle of the lesson. sighz....
went to do art again, nothing much la. went to see cheryl's lino...their ones are really quite nice. err...went home...and got cheryl's sms...
SHE GOT THE CALL TOO! OH MY GOD!
sigh...duno when this thing will continue...im getting a little bit worried. sighz...i havent written the report for sharon phua yet...walau eh...and then i smsed jy, and then he's online...so i have to unblock him and talk to him. stupid.
sighz.
he sounded really concerned.
Had whitby's lesson, practical criticism of poems, compare and contrast again. I dun really quite understand them, and one part of the poem has really sexual indications...yuck...i was not very attentive, worrying about the heavy clouds outsides thr.out the lesson, i dun want it to rain, wana have pe. Guess whitby is pissed.
Bad luck, it started pouring when the bell rang. sighz, pe was cancelled, so went to eat, was expecting to see him there in the canteen, he always eat there at around the 2nd period cos it's his free period. But then...i din see him today....
Int. hist..went thr. china's emergence...ark...have to do essay outline for Japan industrial miracle...sighz...heavy contents...
GC..mrs nair looked thr. my cca achievements...okay...can upload on km le.
lunch, went down to canteen to accompany karen ear her lunch, and surprise surprise, saw him eating in the canteen, said "hi" and nothing else.
went to do art during free period...nothing much was done, fell asleep and...sighz...damn tired and slapped myself to wake up. then cancelled math tuition with jensen, cos really tired.
math...sat on the stairs waiting for mr tsang to arrive, and then saw jy walking by...we both said nothing, probably he din see me. Had math, fell asleep in the middle of the lesson. sighz....
went to do art again, nothing much la. went to see cheryl's lino...their ones are really quite nice. err...went home...and got cheryl's sms...
SHE GOT THE CALL TOO! OH MY GOD!
sigh...duno when this thing will continue...im getting a little bit worried. sighz...i havent written the report for sharon phua yet...walau eh...and then i smsed jy, and then he's online...so i have to unblock him and talk to him. stupid.
sighz.
he sounded really concerned.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
MSN life without Shenjiayi---Day4
Today is practically a free day for me. Had first 2 periods were free periods, then went for lit lect, then free period, lunch, then hist lect ms lim was sick, then GP watched movie “Hotel Rwanda”, contact and CAAL did practically nothing, Mrs Nair dismissed us at 2pm.
Then……I went to ar21 to do my coursework photoshop and at the same time, watch the rest of “Hotel Rwanda” (I borrowed it from Ms Tan). And thennnnnnnn at around 3pm he came in to AR21, I did not see him coming in, until I saw his bag at the door. Apparently he left after he came in to the room.Then later i went to ceramics, on the way back i saw him walking towards AR21, he saw me too. Then he came into ar21, and walked inwards and then saw me, so he came over to chat with me. So he probably dun really "dun like me"...kk...im not giving myself any false hopes. Anyway...we chatted for a while, laughed as usual, sometimes i wonder why i tend to laugh so much when im with him...hmmmm....anyway..he's been complaining about why cheryl was still not there. They were supposed to meet outside dm to do the noticeboard. Anyway, he mentioned cheryl's name for not less than 20 times within that...say...30min or 40min??? and i was like...telling him to behave normally,ha ha, he's juz too eager to see cheryl. and then i went to coro to take passport photos, and helped them buy material for noticeboard. Then when i went back, they are still...just starting and duno wad to do. At first i din want to help one, but then cheryl keep on bugging me, so i stayed and helped...cheryl's damn HIGH today...hahaha..we 2 kept on bullying jy...think he very poor thing...president do saigang...err...hahaha..anyway...think all 3 of us had fun today:P:P
but then to think of it...it seems that it is always the darkroom managers who remain there in ps even after they retire. and last year the previous darkrm manager came and help us with the open day preparation as well...hmmm...should i go and see their open day nxt fri???nooooo...i shld really focus on my course work le. and probably besides cheryl and jy, no juniors wana to see me la, think im becoming more and more irritating to them....
(oh yeah, cheryl's super good with photoshop...shld i go and find her to help me with my coursework????hahahaha)
ps: blahhhhhh...nxt mon go do body check up again...:(
Then……I went to ar21 to do my coursework photoshop and at the same time, watch the rest of “Hotel Rwanda” (I borrowed it from Ms Tan). And thennnnnnnn at around 3pm he came in to AR21, I did not see him coming in, until I saw his bag at the door. Apparently he left after he came in to the room.Then later i went to ceramics, on the way back i saw him walking towards AR21, he saw me too. Then he came into ar21, and walked inwards and then saw me, so he came over to chat with me. So he probably dun really "dun like me"...kk...im not giving myself any false hopes. Anyway...we chatted for a while, laughed as usual, sometimes i wonder why i tend to laugh so much when im with him...hmmmm....anyway..he's been complaining about why cheryl was still not there. They were supposed to meet outside dm to do the noticeboard. Anyway, he mentioned cheryl's name for not less than 20 times within that...say...30min or 40min??? and i was like...telling him to behave normally,ha ha, he's juz too eager to see cheryl. and then i went to coro to take passport photos, and helped them buy material for noticeboard. Then when i went back, they are still...just starting and duno wad to do. At first i din want to help one, but then cheryl keep on bugging me, so i stayed and helped...cheryl's damn HIGH today...hahaha..we 2 kept on bullying jy...think he very poor thing...president do saigang...err...hahaha..anyway...think all 3 of us had fun today:P:P
but then to think of it...it seems that it is always the darkroom managers who remain there in ps even after they retire. and last year the previous darkrm manager came and help us with the open day preparation as well...hmmm...should i go and see their open day nxt fri???nooooo...i shld really focus on my course work le. and probably besides cheryl and jy, no juniors wana to see me la, think im becoming more and more irritating to them....
(oh yeah, cheryl's super good with photoshop...shld i go and find her to help me with my coursework????hahahaha)
ps: blahhhhhh...nxt mon go do body check up again...:(
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
MSN life without Shenjiayi---Day3
I wanted to see him on the way back from assembly...but too bad...morning announcement said that all cca presidents are to assemble at grand stand for briefing. so...well...no fate ha ha.
Had math...ms ling is just cool, some questions that i dun understand for one whole yr she only used 5 min to make and totally understand..wah...cool. And the funny part is with Jensen...we were sitting together as usual, and then he's teaching me as usual. But then this time, there's one qn he said he duno how to do...as in..."duno how to prove that the ans is correct" but he got the ans. which is 5. then ms ling explained the qn to the class, cos apparently it's the most diff. one. Then in the end the correct ans. is : 5. then i asked Jensen how he did it...he said "trial and error...very easy one..."...-_-''''...im juz stupid. then later duno why and how...i dropped my pencil case, and almost at the same time, he dropped his, and then the class started laughing in a evil way...walau eh...they think too much. sighz...and later there's one qn abt... x being between 3 and 7. so ms ling said that 3 and 7 are not included, but Jensen kept telling me that in language terms, 3 and 7 shld be included..so i listened to him in silence, and then said in a damn cool way,"but Jensen, you see, we are doing mathematics now, we shld follow the mathematical language"...(one of the rare times that i sound serious..wahahaha) then the class laughed again...Jensen was... STUNNED!
anyway...pissed off Andrea Tan during GP..cos i was pissed off by her, she made us do a timed compre test ysd and today she gave back and din mark, as us to mark ourselves...wad the hell...then why the need to have a tcher then? stu do and stu mark!...then i went to read my hist notes, then she called my name, then i stopped reading but went to sleep...then she became profoundly pissed off...so she scolded the whole class..cos without me, no one in the class ever ans her qns...so it was...super duper quiet...her own bloody prob!..tmr she said will let us watch "Hotel Rwanda" movie...we'll see how...but one period 50min wont be enough anyway...
art...quite a bit of improvement, made one out of the 50 final images that im supposed to do...showed mr lee..he's pretty happy with it...but then...well...he still wana me to paint...but no time alr...i dun wana spend too much time on art alr...he's face simply pisses me off sometimes...
okay...it's the third day without seeing his email add in my msn list...how stupid....i miss him....
Had math...ms ling is just cool, some questions that i dun understand for one whole yr she only used 5 min to make and totally understand..wah...cool. And the funny part is with Jensen...we were sitting together as usual, and then he's teaching me as usual. But then this time, there's one qn he said he duno how to do...as in..."duno how to prove that the ans is correct" but he got the ans. which is 5. then ms ling explained the qn to the class, cos apparently it's the most diff. one. Then in the end the correct ans. is : 5. then i asked Jensen how he did it...he said "trial and error...very easy one..."...-_-''''...im juz stupid. then later duno why and how...i dropped my pencil case, and almost at the same time, he dropped his, and then the class started laughing in a evil way...walau eh...they think too much. sighz...and later there's one qn abt... x being between 3 and 7. so ms ling said that 3 and 7 are not included, but Jensen kept telling me that in language terms, 3 and 7 shld be included..so i listened to him in silence, and then said in a damn cool way,"but Jensen, you see, we are doing mathematics now, we shld follow the mathematical language"...(one of the rare times that i sound serious..wahahaha) then the class laughed again...Jensen was... STUNNED!
anyway...pissed off Andrea Tan during GP..cos i was pissed off by her, she made us do a timed compre test ysd and today she gave back and din mark, as us to mark ourselves...wad the hell...then why the need to have a tcher then? stu do and stu mark!...then i went to read my hist notes, then she called my name, then i stopped reading but went to sleep...then she became profoundly pissed off...so she scolded the whole class..cos without me, no one in the class ever ans her qns...so it was...super duper quiet...her own bloody prob!..tmr she said will let us watch "Hotel Rwanda" movie...we'll see how...but one period 50min wont be enough anyway...
art...quite a bit of improvement, made one out of the 50 final images that im supposed to do...showed mr lee..he's pretty happy with it...but then...well...he still wana me to paint...but no time alr...i dun wana spend too much time on art alr...he's face simply pisses me off sometimes...
okay...it's the third day without seeing his email add in my msn list...how stupid....i miss him....
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
MSN life without shen jiayi--Day 2
This morning, went to see sharon phua with ms chan in the morning. I shldn't have seen her. The first thing she said to me was, "take off your necklace" and then she turned to tell ms chan about how she has reminded me many times about the necklace thing. I dint really care, the motive of me seeing her today was to clearify with her about the serial prank call. And she asked a lot of questions, and asked me to give her a written report with ALL the details in it. My gosh, do i look so free? wadever, i dun dare to say no. And she asked me to make a police report, wad the hell, my mum will kill me! she's alr. so pissed off with me for...spending time on this issue. anyway...sharon phua displayed profound discrimination against PRC students, insisting that the culprit must be a PRC. wadever...i din dare to oppose because, i also do think the same. At least not singaporean, might be taiwanese or hongkonger. wadever...anyway, she mentioned that aep students are to becareful during this so called "course work period" as the culprit is predicted to be rather familiar with the art block. Also...well...she said pretty sure that the person is one of the ps guy. oh well...and then later when i hear daphne's recorded call record...i found the voice familiar...a little too familiar..he sounded exactly like Li Ang...but im not 100% sure...so i din tell ms chan when she asked me. But...i was telling jy abt it...and he said he was thinking abt him too....anyway...i passed the key back to ms chan, she collected longhao and jy's keys too. oh well...from today onwards no one is supposed to hold the dm key...wow...finally.
anyway, i was not able to keep the promise of ignoring jy. I made him help me move the working table to the gallery. and then went into darkrm and had fun with him again. we laughed a lot today. as usual. i beat him and massaged for him and teased him, everything seemed so nice and normal. oh well...im still not gona readd him on msn, it's all too hard to end, but it's all too hard to start again. let's just see what happens.
and...had a timed compre test for GP, and had a pretty good discussion during SEA hist. And did nothing for art again...need to clear the table tmr.
anyway, i was not able to keep the promise of ignoring jy. I made him help me move the working table to the gallery. and then went into darkrm and had fun with him again. we laughed a lot today. as usual. i beat him and massaged for him and teased him, everything seemed so nice and normal. oh well...im still not gona readd him on msn, it's all too hard to end, but it's all too hard to start again. let's just see what happens.
and...had a timed compre test for GP, and had a pretty good discussion during SEA hist. And did nothing for art again...need to clear the table tmr.
Monday, August 13, 2007
Life without shen jiayi---Day1
today started out bad. I woke up ard 920am, and then started mugging SAT book. But somehow, mum came in and started the whole Uni application issue all over again. She's pissed that i dun want to apply Harvard, Yale and Princeton. She's even more pissed to see that im applying for UK and not yet US. sigh. Why adults just like to refuse to live in reality???
My reasons for not applying top universities:
1) My grades are simply not good enough. Yes, i am almost at 70+ percentile for every subject, but it only means that im in the top 20+% in NJC, not talking abt the whole of Singapore, not talking about the whole world.
2) I did my research, Uni like Harvard and Yale and..yeah..Princeton, only accept like 2% foreign students a year, and like less than 2 from each of the Asian Countries.
3) Uni like Harvard and Yale are mainly better for post graduate studies
4) in any case, for US uni application, each application costs you at least $50 US dollar. so even an idiot also knows you have to choose wisely. I am not the type who love to throw money into the sea.
5) I know where i stand. As simple as that.
My reasons for doing UK applications first
1) They have earlier deadlines.
2) I have already chosen the few schools that i want, not like US..which im still wondering if i shld apply common uni, or liberal arts uni, or art uni.
I wana go: London School of Economics, Warwick Uni, Imperial College, Leagues, Goldsmith...yeah...something like this.
3) UK is more systematic, and DO NOT need SAT results.
My parents' thoughts:
1) i dun care about the application fees, i just want to see my daughter ending up in a prestigeous uni.
2) Im not gona fund her a single cent if she takes art course
3) my daughter will graduate and enter ministry of foreign affairs and therefore, she can only major in : Political science/international relations, journalism, political sociology, politics, mass communications, law.
oh gosh...my mum beat me up this morning simply because she thinks that im lack of determination, self esteem and the fighting spirit. Yes, aft she beat me, i kind of gained the fighting spirit, but it is directed against her! she scolded jy again. sometimes i felt sorry for him, aways kena dragged into this kind of things. My parents only have me, the only child. Until now they still cant accept the idea that i can ever like a guy, cos they know me, im a very proud girl, i use to despise guys, so if one day i really do fall for a guy, if must be he is better than me in someway, yeah, that's wad my parents cant believe in. They simply cant believe there can be someone who's better than me in anyway. Which im like...amazed, cos...im sure...of the 6billion people on earth, there's at least 9million ppl who are better than me~!!! but think my parents will kill themselves if we force them to admit the truth....
anyway...today is the first day since i blocked jy...feels...weird cos i cant even find his email add on my msn list...cos i deleted it at the same time. oh well...it's a good strategy...last time i block him and then aft like a few hrs i will juz unblock him cos when he comes online i will feel like talking to him, but now, i dun even know if he's online cos i cant see either, so...ha ha ha...it's more useful...so can really stop talking:)...oh...yk sent me a few of the old 05 photos of ps, let me see the young jy...wow...he used to have a lot of hair siah?!
My reasons for not applying top universities:
1) My grades are simply not good enough. Yes, i am almost at 70+ percentile for every subject, but it only means that im in the top 20+% in NJC, not talking abt the whole of Singapore, not talking about the whole world.
2) I did my research, Uni like Harvard and Yale and..yeah..Princeton, only accept like 2% foreign students a year, and like less than 2 from each of the Asian Countries.
3) Uni like Harvard and Yale are mainly better for post graduate studies
4) in any case, for US uni application, each application costs you at least $50 US dollar. so even an idiot also knows you have to choose wisely. I am not the type who love to throw money into the sea.
5) I know where i stand. As simple as that.
My reasons for doing UK applications first
1) They have earlier deadlines.
2) I have already chosen the few schools that i want, not like US..which im still wondering if i shld apply common uni, or liberal arts uni, or art uni.
I wana go: London School of Economics, Warwick Uni, Imperial College, Leagues, Goldsmith...yeah...something like this.
3) UK is more systematic, and DO NOT need SAT results.
My parents' thoughts:
1) i dun care about the application fees, i just want to see my daughter ending up in a prestigeous uni.
2) Im not gona fund her a single cent if she takes art course
3) my daughter will graduate and enter ministry of foreign affairs and therefore, she can only major in : Political science/international relations, journalism, political sociology, politics, mass communications, law.
oh gosh...my mum beat me up this morning simply because she thinks that im lack of determination, self esteem and the fighting spirit. Yes, aft she beat me, i kind of gained the fighting spirit, but it is directed against her! she scolded jy again. sometimes i felt sorry for him, aways kena dragged into this kind of things. My parents only have me, the only child. Until now they still cant accept the idea that i can ever like a guy, cos they know me, im a very proud girl, i use to despise guys, so if one day i really do fall for a guy, if must be he is better than me in someway, yeah, that's wad my parents cant believe in. They simply cant believe there can be someone who's better than me in anyway. Which im like...amazed, cos...im sure...of the 6billion people on earth, there's at least 9million ppl who are better than me~!!! but think my parents will kill themselves if we force them to admit the truth....
anyway...today is the first day since i blocked jy...feels...weird cos i cant even find his email add on my msn list...cos i deleted it at the same time. oh well...it's a good strategy...last time i block him and then aft like a few hrs i will juz unblock him cos when he comes online i will feel like talking to him, but now, i dun even know if he's online cos i cant see either, so...ha ha ha...it's more useful...so can really stop talking:)...oh...yk sent me a few of the old 05 photos of ps, let me see the young jy...wow...he used to have a lot of hair siah?!
Sunday, August 12, 2007
snape...my hero
在这部系列里，我最钦佩和喜爱的角色便是斯内普了，一个有隐忍的大丈夫，被误会了也无所谓。他是一个常被误会，又对误会无所谓的人物。感觉上有点像自己，总是被人误会，到现在我已无力再解释了。所谓：清者自清，浊者自浊
整部《哈利·波特》中最富有悲剧色彩的人，究竟是谁？如果说小天狼星是含冤十数年，被关押追捕乃至逃亡，最后雪冤在即却英勇牺牲，是最为悲惨的人，那么还有人临终前的境况比他更令人扼腕。他就是西弗勒斯·斯内普。
在电影中，谁的造型更令人反感。回答也许有很多，伏地魔的造型令人恐惧，食死徒们的疯狂的装束让人惊恐，但是在魔法学校里，最让人反感无疑是这位不遗余力为难哈利的斯内普教授了。
“先生，斯内普他……”
“是斯内普教授，哈利”
“好吧，斯内普教授。”
如果不是邓布利多教授的劝解，哈利也许会更加讨厌斯内普。真的，只要看电影里他的造型，就知道他是多么惹人厌，油腻腻的黑头发贴在额角，终日是一身玄衣，总是厌恶的盯着哈利，每节课都竭尽全力找借口，施展权限，让哈利和他的朋友不快，这位斯内普教授可真够讨厌的。在年轻的哈利进入魔法学校的第一节魔药课上，斯内普就让哈利出足了洋相。他询问了一个非魔法家庭出生的孩子最难回答的问题，彻底羞辱了从小习惯沉默的孤儿哈利，伤害了哈利受尽磨折的教父小天狼星·布莱克，并最终也是他的报信，让布莱克死在了魔法部里。让大家对他产生了说不出的反感。
每当斯内普[扮演者艾伦·里克曼 (Alan Rickman)]紧盯着哈利，并且阴阳怪气的说出伤害哈利的话，都会让人感到这是一个卑鄙小人在以羞辱的方式宣泄他近二十年输给哈利父亲的屈辱。内心戏往往是最难出演的，每每我们总能读出斯内普目光中的厌恶还有一股说不清的东西。究竟是什么，还是那句话，感觉很复杂，说不清楚。究竟什么才是内心戏，很简单也很困难——就是心里想着我爱你，说出来的却是别的话。但是眼神，行为举止却泄露了这样的内心活动。换句话说，只有完全入戏的演员才能做到这一点。对于艾伦·里克曼 (Alan Rickman)的演技，相信没有人会去质疑。出身舞台剧的里克曼，有着最扎实的演技。他蹒跚而行，他阴郁而动，他狂暴而为，他冷嘲热讽，无不展现了一个狭隘的斯内普的所为。
斯内普的所做作为，为的都是打击哈利·波特和他的朋友，服务于伏地魔。真是魔法学校教师中的败类。然而，这一切都是真的么？如果斯内普真的痛恨哈利，那么他有很多次机会杀死哈利。如果他真的痛恨哈利，希望他死，那么他并不需要做什么，只需要不做什么就可以了。他可以选择不去救他，不去帮助他，为什么他一面折磨他，一面又帮助他，还总是凝望着哈利的眼睛，总是神情复杂的看着他的眼睛。当摄影机的镜头在慢慢推进，为的是给食死徒斯内普的眼神一个特写，人们禁不住会想：斯内普，疯了吗？
每一集里斯内普折磨人的招数总是常换常新，层出不穷，总是让哈利难堪，当斯内普身着黑衣，疯狂的与小天狼星搏斗时，每个人都感到了一股仇恨的血液在涌动。他是为了保护哈利，最后却查出了真相。镜头残酷而真实的记录了这一切。每一次，斯内普都是这样，虽然仇恨着哈利，却帮助着哈利。
直到最后一部，揭开了电影里令人印象深刻的镜头——斯内普总是凝望哈利眼睛的秘密。原来他通过孩子的眼睛追忆孩子的母亲：自己最爱的女子——莉莉。直到最后一刻，他用自己的记忆，解释了这一切。原来此生，他最爱的人竟然是哈利的母亲。从阴沉的少年时代，到进入魔法学校，再到孩子们一起学习、思考人生、慢慢长大，他始终爱着她。可是，莉莉最终还是被詹姆，哈利的父亲所吸引，并与之相爱结婚。失落的痛苦将他推入深渊，为了她，他宁愿向邓布利多报信，最后莉莉的死给了他最大的打击。虽然憎恨哈利的父亲詹姆，他却保护了他的儿子哈利。他所有的一切都是为了爱，他用全部的生命爱一个麻瓜女子，超越了时空与仇恨，跨越了种族与偏见，并最终无惧的迎来死亡，卸下重担。西弗勒斯· 斯内普尽管没有绅士的行为，却仍然不失为一个英雄，因为爱情而勇敢付出，与邪恶势力较量的英雄。
Super pervertice idiot stalker!
He replied:
hey,
it's ok already(: dun worry too much, see u on monday. hope this matter will resolve asap((:
jiayi
不出我所料，是个惜字如金的男生。算了，过去了，捱过去就行了，就像戒烟，戒酒，戒毒一样。
i blocked him and deleted his add on msn
i deleted his HP no.
and on coming mon, i shall go up to third floor art gallery to work, shall not go ar21 unnecessarily so as to not to see him.
one side note: i received a damn weird call this morning, the guy has a very soft, soothing and nice voice that did not lead me into thinking of anything weird and evil. But he said something shocking.He told me that he saw me "bao guang" last wk at art block 2nd floor. He kept on telling me that he saw my underwear and kept on asking me to be careful. And continuously asking me who do i think he is. But i was so super brainless and funny that time, he spoke in chinese, so naturally led to me thinking that he's one of the sph person, cos his voice very soft and i was supposed to attend a meeting at sph today. So i tot it was dianjun, cos his voice also very soft and gentle and nice. But then he sounded ambiguous when he heard the name "dian jun" and said something like "if u think im dian jun then i am lor"...err...i kept on laughing and guessing, cos i really tot that he's one of my friend trying to play with me...until...
until i told jiayi online, abt what happened, and he told me that daphne and meiling also got the same kind of call...then i asked daph...then she said in her calls...the guy said that he saw her "bao guang" and took photos and wana publicise. then in meiling's case, he kept on asking her who she thinks he is. And my case is some sort of a combination of theirs. oh well...to think i was laughing thr.out when i received the call, and now...it sends shivers up my spines. anyway...daph told me the guy that called her tried to make his voice low...just like my case. and then i told ms chan, she asked me to check miss calls, so i checked, i got 2 miss calls from a number starting with 6, at ard ysd midnight. Then i sent that number to ms chan, she said it's the same number that called daphne. but the number that i picked up this morning is private number. anyway...i called back the 6....number, then someone picked up, but no sound. so super eerie!
ms chan said she has alr. reported to sharon phua and the police, investigation is underway, and now all guys in ps are somewhat "suspected" because...it seems that it's only the photog girls kena victimised. oh well....but why me???? i have alr. retired!!!!...shit!!!!ms chan suspect that he has a ps contact list...
anyway...im purely unlucky!
should i go and buy sexy underwears so that if he stalks on me further, the photos wont look bad? kkkkk!!!! yeah...im kidding!!!!!
hey,
it's ok already(: dun worry too much, see u on monday. hope this matter will resolve asap((:
jiayi
不出我所料，是个惜字如金的男生。算了，过去了，捱过去就行了，就像戒烟，戒酒，戒毒一样。
i blocked him and deleted his add on msn
i deleted his HP no.
and on coming mon, i shall go up to third floor art gallery to work, shall not go ar21 unnecessarily so as to not to see him.
one side note: i received a damn weird call this morning, the guy has a very soft, soothing and nice voice that did not lead me into thinking of anything weird and evil. But he said something shocking.He told me that he saw me "bao guang" last wk at art block 2nd floor. He kept on telling me that he saw my underwear and kept on asking me to be careful. And continuously asking me who do i think he is. But i was so super brainless and funny that time, he spoke in chinese, so naturally led to me thinking that he's one of the sph person, cos his voice very soft and i was supposed to attend a meeting at sph today. So i tot it was dianjun, cos his voice also very soft and gentle and nice. But then he sounded ambiguous when he heard the name "dian jun" and said something like "if u think im dian jun then i am lor"...err...i kept on laughing and guessing, cos i really tot that he's one of my friend trying to play with me...until...
until i told jiayi online, abt what happened, and he told me that daphne and meiling also got the same kind of call...then i asked daph...then she said in her calls...the guy said that he saw her "bao guang" and took photos and wana publicise. then in meiling's case, he kept on asking her who she thinks he is. And my case is some sort of a combination of theirs. oh well...to think i was laughing thr.out when i received the call, and now...it sends shivers up my spines. anyway...daph told me the guy that called her tried to make his voice low...just like my case. and then i told ms chan, she asked me to check miss calls, so i checked, i got 2 miss calls from a number starting with 6, at ard ysd midnight. Then i sent that number to ms chan, she said it's the same number that called daphne. but the number that i picked up this morning is private number. anyway...i called back the 6....number, then someone picked up, but no sound. so super eerie!
ms chan said she has alr. reported to sharon phua and the police, investigation is underway, and now all guys in ps are somewhat "suspected" because...it seems that it's only the photog girls kena victimised. oh well....but why me???? i have alr. retired!!!!...shit!!!!ms chan suspect that he has a ps contact list...
anyway...im purely unlucky!
should i go and buy sexy underwears so that if he stalks on me further, the photos wont look bad? kkkkk!!!! yeah...im kidding!!!!!
Saturday, August 11, 2007
请问：哪里有卖后悔药？
嘉易：
首先我要再次向你表达我的歉意，真的很对不起。是我的错，我明白，有些事是不能随便拿来开玩笑的，早上我其实不是有意要开玩笑的，真的是有些被吓到了，不过不管怎样，还是是我太过分了。我总是这样，不敏感，总是说一些令我自己都会后悔的话。和你一起工作那么久，本应该明白什么该说，什么不该说，尤其是在和你说话的时候就更应该注意。你这人虽不拘小节，从不介意别人拿你开玩笑或欺负你（当然必须是善意的）；但大原则上从来都是一丝不苟，不会做出让步的。你一直都谨小慎微，不去惹别人，努力去做到让每个人都开心，去营造完美的形象，而我今天的不恰当的言语无疑是触碰了你的底线，真的是很对不起，不过你放心，那些话我是再也不会说了。
真的很抱歉，在过去的一年中总是给你添麻烦，总是有事没事地找你麻烦，心情好就拿你来寻开心，心情不好就把你当出气筒。其实我一直把你当好朋友，一直很想帮你，只是我的脾气有时连自己也管不住它，最后弄得你很无辜地成为牺牲品。是我把你的宽容，你的忍耐，你的好脾气当成了无可厚非的“应该”，是我一味地不知分寸，踩着你的底线走还要你完全服从。我知道你是出于本性的善良，才容忍了我那么久，其实没有这个必要的嘉易，我是个被宠坏了的小孩，你的容忍是对我的纵容，我想是时候停止这种宽容了，是我不知惜福，不知道珍惜美好的友情，也许只有在失去了对我最重要的友谊之后才能让我学会珍惜。人们总是说“忍无可忍，无需再忍”，所以不要再委屈自己去忍耐了，这一年里，我不知道做过多少错事，不知道对你们说过多少个“对不起”可结果我却还是没变，仍然任性且不可理喻，所以现在连我都对自己的“对不起”产生了怀疑，就像Ian说的，我是不可以被信任和原谅的。
最后，再次想你说一声“对不起”，早上我不是那个意思，就算我怀疑全世界，也不会怀疑你，你是有你的缺点，但你是君子，这一点我从来没有质疑过。早上的事，真的很后悔，因为说出去的话就像是泼出去的水一样，无法收回了。
王茉
（你应该知道，每当我用华文写的时候，我都是很郑重的，所以这一次，我是郑重的向你道歉，没有在开玩笑，没有在“酸”你，没有在赌气。）
首先我要再次向你表达我的歉意，真的很对不起。是我的错，我明白，有些事是不能随便拿来开玩笑的，早上我其实不是有意要开玩笑的，真的是有些被吓到了，不过不管怎样，还是是我太过分了。我总是这样，不敏感，总是说一些令我自己都会后悔的话。和你一起工作那么久，本应该明白什么该说，什么不该说，尤其是在和你说话的时候就更应该注意。你这人虽不拘小节，从不介意别人拿你开玩笑或欺负你（当然必须是善意的）；但大原则上从来都是一丝不苟，不会做出让步的。你一直都谨小慎微，不去惹别人，努力去做到让每个人都开心，去营造完美的形象，而我今天的不恰当的言语无疑是触碰了你的底线，真的是很对不起，不过你放心，那些话我是再也不会说了。
真的很抱歉，在过去的一年中总是给你添麻烦，总是有事没事地找你麻烦，心情好就拿你来寻开心，心情不好就把你当出气筒。其实我一直把你当好朋友，一直很想帮你，只是我的脾气有时连自己也管不住它，最后弄得你很无辜地成为牺牲品。是我把你的宽容，你的忍耐，你的好脾气当成了无可厚非的“应该”，是我一味地不知分寸，踩着你的底线走还要你完全服从。我知道你是出于本性的善良，才容忍了我那么久，其实没有这个必要的嘉易，我是个被宠坏了的小孩，你的容忍是对我的纵容，我想是时候停止这种宽容了，是我不知惜福，不知道珍惜美好的友情，也许只有在失去了对我最重要的友谊之后才能让我学会珍惜。人们总是说“忍无可忍，无需再忍”，所以不要再委屈自己去忍耐了，这一年里，我不知道做过多少错事，不知道对你们说过多少个“对不起”可结果我却还是没变，仍然任性且不可理喻，所以现在连我都对自己的“对不起”产生了怀疑，就像Ian说的，我是不可以被信任和原谅的。
最后，再次想你说一声“对不起”，早上我不是那个意思，就算我怀疑全世界，也不会怀疑你，你是有你的缺点，但你是君子，这一点我从来没有质疑过。早上的事，真的很后悔，因为说出去的话就像是泼出去的水一样，无法收回了。
王茉
（你应该知道，每当我用华文写的时候，我都是很郑重的，所以这一次，我是郑重的向你道歉，没有在开玩笑，没有在“酸”你，没有在赌气。）
Thursday, August 09, 2007
青春
青春, 其实说穿了，青春只是一个约定俗成的过程。因为没有经历过，所以一开始我们都不懂得。我们都是有着美好憧憬的孩子，我们不相信自己会输得那么惨，因此固执地以为自己是幸运的例外。我们期盼着爱情的芬芳，沉迷于自我的忧伤，有过类似的泪流满面，有过对蓝天的恋慕和仰望。
我们渴望自由，总是希望大人们不再干涉我们的选择；我们有自己的思想，有痴迷的喜欢的作品，一同关注的焦点，共同热衷的话题；我们充满着对成人世界的好奇，藏着一些只有密友才知道的秘密；我们都有过一心向往的国度和城市，有过远走他乡离家出走的念头；我们都曾冲动过，也为自己的年轻付出过代价，但从不计较得失；我们青春的故事里，都体验过离别的伤逝，有过一梦三四年的经历；我们明知道会被人伤害，却仍会义无返顾地决意要尝试那诱人的禁果，然后坚强的微笑着；我们都希望能放肆一回，轰轰烈烈的爱一场，因为这是成熟的必经之路；我们追逐着自己的梦，寻找着一个可能永远没有正解的答案；我们边走边唱，青春已在我们的歌声中不经意地老去。
后来的我们，总会不小心验证了上一代的预言。青春的最后，一切激情都将归于平淡，一切爱恋都不再甜蜜光鲜，一切誓言都会随风而逝，剩下的只是怅然若失的明媚。当我们开始怀念青春往事的时候，它已经消失。留下的只是无声的回忆，零星的片段。因为有爱，所以没有再爱；因为纯情，所以得不到感情。
我们依稀还是会记得那个真心爱过的人，表达过的爱意和思念，一起许下的山盟海誓，虽然它注定会随云飘散，无法实现。人生苦短，所有的伤口总能愈合，不管它曾经有多痛，生活依然是细水长流，不会为谁失去了谁而停下。我们只能悼念那场没有结果的爱情，在青春的末梢，不能搁置，无处安放，无法埋葬。
青春究竟是什么呢？纯粹的哭，纯粹的笑，纯粹的做自己想做的事，不掺杂半点世俗的圣洁，就像绽放的雪百合那般。是的，我们有时可能无法把握自己的爱情，无法掌握自己的青春，不能拥有自己的生活。但是我想，在我们拥有它的时候，也许可以投入得更多一些，更真实一点。因为当你爱上一个人的时候，青春会告诉你他赋予你的涵义，那时的你会为此放弃全世界而毫无顾忌。青春流逝在这青春中间。
我们渴望自由，总是希望大人们不再干涉我们的选择；我们有自己的思想，有痴迷的喜欢的作品，一同关注的焦点，共同热衷的话题；我们充满着对成人世界的好奇，藏着一些只有密友才知道的秘密；我们都有过一心向往的国度和城市，有过远走他乡离家出走的念头；我们都曾冲动过，也为自己的年轻付出过代价，但从不计较得失；我们青春的故事里，都体验过离别的伤逝，有过一梦三四年的经历；我们明知道会被人伤害，却仍会义无返顾地决意要尝试那诱人的禁果，然后坚强的微笑着；我们都希望能放肆一回，轰轰烈烈的爱一场，因为这是成熟的必经之路；我们追逐着自己的梦，寻找着一个可能永远没有正解的答案；我们边走边唱，青春已在我们的歌声中不经意地老去。
后来的我们，总会不小心验证了上一代的预言。青春的最后，一切激情都将归于平淡，一切爱恋都不再甜蜜光鲜，一切誓言都会随风而逝，剩下的只是怅然若失的明媚。当我们开始怀念青春往事的时候，它已经消失。留下的只是无声的回忆，零星的片段。因为有爱，所以没有再爱；因为纯情，所以得不到感情。
我们依稀还是会记得那个真心爱过的人，表达过的爱意和思念，一起许下的山盟海誓，虽然它注定会随云飘散，无法实现。人生苦短，所有的伤口总能愈合，不管它曾经有多痛，生活依然是细水长流，不会为谁失去了谁而停下。我们只能悼念那场没有结果的爱情，在青春的末梢，不能搁置，无处安放，无法埋葬。
青春究竟是什么呢？纯粹的哭，纯粹的笑，纯粹的做自己想做的事，不掺杂半点世俗的圣洁，就像绽放的雪百合那般。是的，我们有时可能无法把握自己的爱情，无法掌握自己的青春，不能拥有自己的生活。但是我想，在我们拥有它的时候，也许可以投入得更多一些，更真实一点。因为当你爱上一个人的时候，青春会告诉你他赋予你的涵义，那时的你会为此放弃全世界而毫无顾忌。青春流逝在这青春中间。
who am i? what am i like? i really duno...
came across this site...then suddenly felt like doing such things..funny...ha ha...accuracy wise not bad laz...ha ha ha...im becoming more and more...sighz...superstitious? nono..that's not the right word to use...heehee...
yes...im sensitive...but sometimes overly sensitive...stupid....
my life is going on well? are u trying to bluff me? i know how bad it is...
Im sane? no im not...shit..i juz want a guy who loves me more than i love him...
hmmm....im a little stingy...hmmm...then where did all my $ go??? wahhhh...cry siah..find romantic partner thr. hobby? photography? am i stretching too far? ha ha...yar...i want him to be more open...
this is very true...hahaha...im never nerdy:P
hmmmm...oh welll....the engineer part im not really sure lehz...heehee
okay...i agree to a large extent...wow...
yepyep...this is more like me...
wow...i din know im the steady kind lehz...but heehee...shenjiayi's in fire sign i guess...aries mahz...wow...heehee...shit...stop thinking abt that shit..!!! >:(
NONONONONO!!! i will die at the age of 48, no joke abt that!
hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
wah...this is too much a compliment...i tot i always leave bad impressions...
my views and goals have changed drastically ever since i fell in love with jy...now i just want to be a good housewife...provided if i can have a loving husband. However..i think my initial traits are still somewhere within me, they are not gone...so let's say if i dun get to enjoy a happy relationship or marriage, im sure i will become a career woman instead and conquering the world would be my ideal goal by then...
true true...
not true lor..he's not interested at all...
not bad not bad
crush? or obsession? or love? or friendship?
yes.
ARHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
| Guys Like That You're Sensitive |
 And not in that "cry at a drop of a hat" sort of way You just get most guys - even if you're not trying to Guys find it is easy to confide in you and tell you their secrets No wonder you tend to get close quickly in relationships! |
yes...im sensitive...but sometimes overly sensitive...stupid....
| Your Life is 37% Off Track |
 In general, your life is going very well. You're quite happy with where you are and what you're doing. And even if you get a bit off course, you're usually able to get back on track easily. |
my life is going on well? are u trying to bluff me? i know how bad it is...
| You Are Picky When it Counts |
 Like most sane women, you want a great guy who will treat you well. But you're also willing to put up with a few flaws in your Mr. Right You should congratulate yourself on having a realistic approach to dating. You probably have quite a few great guys you can date! |
Im sane? no im not...shit..i juz want a guy who loves me more than i love him...
The True You |
 You want your girlfriend or boyfriend to be more open with you. With respect to money, you are a bit stingy. You think good luck will definitely be yours, someday. The hidden side of your personality tends to be satisfied to care for things with a minimal amount of effort. You care more about world trends and fashions than you do about well formed opinions. When it comes to finding a romantic partner, you make opportunities to interact with many people through club activities or a hobby, then select someone you like. |
hmmm....im a little stingy...hmmm...then where did all my $ go??? wahhhh...cry siah..find romantic partner thr. hobby? photography? am i stretching too far? ha ha...yar...i want him to be more open...
| You Are 32% Nerdy |
 You're a little nerdy, but no one would ever call you a nerd. You sometimes get into nerdy things, but only after they've become a part of mainstream culture. |
this is very true...hahaha...im never nerdy:P
| Your Dominant Intelligence is Spatial Intelligence |
 You've got a good sense of space and how the world around you looks. You can close your eyes and "see" images. You have innate artistic talent. An eye for color and shapes, you're also a natural designer. Since you think in pictures, visual aids and demonstartions help you learn best. You would make a good navigator, sculptor, visual artist, inventor, architect, interior designer, or engineer. |
hmmmm...oh welll....the engineer part im not really sure lehz...heehee
| Your Personality is Somewhat Rare (ESFP) |
 Your personality type is playful, charming, open minded, and energetic. Only about 7% of all people have your personality, including 9% of all women and 5% of all men You are Extroverted, Sensing, Feeling, and Perceiving. |
okay...i agree to a large extent...wow...
| Your Five Factor Personality Profile |
 Extroversion: You have high extroversion. You are outgoing and engaging, with both strangers and friends. You truly enjoy being with people and bring energy into any situation. Enthusiastic and fun, you're the first to say "let's go!" Conscientiousness: You have high conscientiousness. Intelligent and reliable, you tend to succeed in life. Most things in your life are organized and planned well. But you borderline on being a total perfectionist. Agreeableness: You have low agreeableness. Your self interest comes first, and others come later, if at all. In general, you feel that people are not to be trusted. And you're skeptical that anyone else really feels differently. Neuroticism: You have medium neuroticism. You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic. Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy. Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is high. In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas. You'll try almost anything interesting, and you're constantly pushing your own limits. A great connoisseir of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything. |
yepyep...this is more like me...
| Your Love Element Is Earth |
 In love, you have consistency and integrity. For you, love is all about staying grounded and centered. You attract others with your zest for life and experiences. Your flirting style is defined by setting the scene, creating a unique moment in time. Steady progress and stability are the cornerstones of your love life. You may take things too slowly, but you never put your heart at risk. You connect best with: Fire Avoid: Wood You and another Earth element: need each other too much to build a good foundation |
wow...i din know im the steady kind lehz...but heehee...shenjiayi's in fire sign i guess...aries mahz...wow...heehee...shit...stop thinking abt that shit..!!! >:(
| You Will Die at Age 67 |
 You're pretty average when it comes to how you live... And how you'll die as well. |
NONONONONO!!! i will die at the age of 48, no joke abt that!
| You Are the Ego |
 You take a balanced approach to your life. You definitely aren't afraid to act out on your desires - even crazy ones. But you usually think first. Morals drive you as much as hedonism does. You've been able to live a life of pleasure... without living a life of excess. |
hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
| You Make a Great First Impression |
 You can handle almost any social situation with grace, even the tricky ones. Strangers often find you charming and interesting. You are often remembered fondly. Even if you're not naturally outgoing, you can make conversation with anyone if you need to. Whether you were born this way or had to work to get here, you are definitely charismatic. You're popular and well liked. People definitely look forward to being around you. Your social connections bring you a full and rich life. You understand how important it is to make a lasting impression. |
wah...this is too much a compliment...i tot i always leave bad impressions...
| You Are Destined to Rule the World |
 You have the makings of a very evil dictator... Which is both kind of cool and kind of scary! Will you rule the world? Maybe. Maybe not. But at least you know that you could. |
my views and goals have changed drastically ever since i fell in love with jy...now i just want to be a good housewife...provided if i can have a loving husband. However..i think my initial traits are still somewhere within me, they are not gone...so let's say if i dun get to enjoy a happy relationship or marriage, im sure i will become a career woman instead and conquering the world would be my ideal goal by then...
| Your Scholastic Strength Is Deep Thinking |
 You aren't afraid to delve head first into a difficult subject, with mastery as your goal. You are talented at adapting, motivating others, managing resources, and analyzing risk. You should major in: Philosophy Music Theology Art History Foreign language |
true true...
| Hmmm... Maybe He's Interested! |
 He seems to be giving you mixed or muted signals Which may mean you've been giving him the wrong messages When he pauses to notice you, give him a little more attention. A little encouragement may go a long way with this guy! |
not true lor..he's not interested at all...
| Your Career Type: Enterprising |
 You are engertic, ambitious, and sociable. Your talents lie in politics, leading people, and selling things or ideas. You would make an excellent: Auctioneer - Bank President - Camp Director City Manager - Judge - Lawyer Recreation Leader - Real Estate Agent - Sales Person School Principal - Travel Agent - TV Newscaster The worst career options for your are investigative careers, like mathematician or architect. |
not bad not bad
| You've Got a Bit of a Crush |
 Maybe your guy friend is a crush of convenience - easy enough to happen Did you just break up with someone? Or are you more lonely than usual? If no to both, then this small crush could be the real deal. Find out if he feels the same - because he just might! |
crush? or obsession? or love? or friendship?
| You Are A Romantic Realist |
 You tend to be grounded when it comes to romance. Sure, you can fall hard... but only for someone you've gotten to know. And once you're in love, you can be a total romantic goofball... But you'd never admit it to your friends! |
yes.
| You're Pretty Stupid |
 You got 5/10 questions right! It's probably time to get your head examined. You hardly know left from right. |
ARHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I din sleep last night! (Happy national day for Spore)
I wasted another day, i wasted yesterday. I chatted with jy and cherze from like 7+ till 10+ and mr lee and ms chan were mad at me. One threatened to use my account and confess to jy (which he eventually did it later -_-''') and the other threatened to throw my laptop down from the third floor. Wow...the art tchers in nj are pro siah...haha. In the end...i ended up being 'punished' by ms chan--helping her to wash all her squeegee and things like that. And as for mr lee...first he attempted to use my msn account (while i was chatting with jy half way) to type "I LOVE YOU"...but luckily i was able to stop his evil act in time. Then he made me to go darkrm to help him take the flood light. (he threatened that if i dun, he'll tell jy i love him! wahhhhh...now a lot of ppl hold my "ba bing" lor) and by the time i came back...i hear him and the rest of the arty farty ppl screaming...and before i realise it, he kinda sent the msg over to jy alr. He typed sth like "i think you are very cute"....err...-_-'' Mr LPG can never grow up...but in the end he went to call jy to admit his wrongdoings and cleared my name. But jy's comment on this whole incident was..."profound" at least he seemed unconcerned.
He said:
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
hahaha
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
relax
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
to put wrong ideas into my head veri difficult
oh well..ok lor..he never even suspected that i've been liking him all along? i doubt it. he's kinda just enjoying the attention that he got from me, that's why even though he knows very well that he doesnt like me, he's not distancing himself from me, enjoying the feeling of being 'liked'...it's strange how i knew abt his mentally so well and still, im liking him this much. My own bloody fault isnt it? i have only myself to blame.
oh....then i painted and practically din sleep for the whole night. Oh yar...this thing is funny...i went to have shower with karen ard 10+pm...then i changed onto the art club tshirt. Bcos the fact that both the front and the back have the David's figure, i did not bother to look carefully. And then...I WORE THE SHIRT WITH ITS BACK SIDE IN FRONT! no wonder the whole while i felt that my neck is so uncomfortable! BUT I DIN REALISE IT UNTIL LIKE HRS AFT I CHANGED...AND NEITHER DID KAREN! no wonder we are friends...am i dumb or am i dumb???? stupid...
and then...i slept...a bit only...at first i fell asleep on the light box...then like a few minutes later i found myself on the floor...i highly suspect i actually "FELL" onto the floor..not moved there. And like i slept less than an hr then mac breakfast came..it's strange how arty stu behave...when xinni called the mac delivery...joyce kept on ask her to ask the person if we were the first oder of the day..hahaha...we are juz weirdoes...think the mac person muz be horrified...anyway..(she said she's not sure if we were the first oder)...oh well...
While i was painting...cosciously and sub consciously...i suddenly heard the darkrm door open...and think cos of my dm habbit...i kind of got this instinct to go and check out who went in...so i went...and IT'S SHEN JIAYI! and...the last person i want to see is him la...cos i never sleep the whole day..i must have looked really horrible!!!! (okay la...i dun look nice even if i sleep 24 hrs a day) but then..still...and ha ha...again he's the ealiest...his exco's lousy...both darkrm manager and the chief photog were not there to arrange for duties today...and no photographers came except the exco...how nice...jy ended up scolding yk at the end...ha ha..anyway...he looked so funny today...and oh yar...ysd he asked me if im gg for their tmr's national day photo outing. And i said no. cos i felt weird. then he said he actually asked other seniors to go as well, like cheefong...junzhan..adi..yar..but diff is diff la..i go there for wad..my photo skills so bad...aiya...they shall have fun man. It's gona be the first ps outing that im not there, ha ha, since last yr, i went for every single outing they had, even those times when i said, im not sure and im not going, in the end, somehow...i always ended up being there with them...but this time...im really really not gg. Good luck to them tmr.
OH YAR! HAD ONE GREAT DISCOVERY TODAY! JIAYI IS ONLY 60 KG! THAT'S REALLY LIGHT!
okie...had lunch with karen at KAP mac...nothing much to say..recently i became closer with karen again..but we ate the lunch in relative silence...only talked a bit about course work...guess we were both too tired...exhuasted and drained...sigh...
slept thr. the entire bus ride...went home..went to cherze's blog and then slept again...wahhh...and im still so super tired...blahhhh
He said:
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
hahaha
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
relax
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
to put wrong ideas into my head veri difficult
oh well..ok lor..he never even suspected that i've been liking him all along? i doubt it. he's kinda just enjoying the attention that he got from me, that's why even though he knows very well that he doesnt like me, he's not distancing himself from me, enjoying the feeling of being 'liked'...it's strange how i knew abt his mentally so well and still, im liking him this much. My own bloody fault isnt it? i have only myself to blame.
oh....then i painted and practically din sleep for the whole night. Oh yar...this thing is funny...i went to have shower with karen ard 10+pm...then i changed onto the art club tshirt. Bcos the fact that both the front and the back have the David's figure, i did not bother to look carefully. And then...I WORE THE SHIRT WITH ITS BACK SIDE IN FRONT! no wonder the whole while i felt that my neck is so uncomfortable! BUT I DIN REALISE IT UNTIL LIKE HRS AFT I CHANGED...AND NEITHER DID KAREN! no wonder we are friends...am i dumb or am i dumb???? stupid...
and then...i slept...a bit only...at first i fell asleep on the light box...then like a few minutes later i found myself on the floor...i highly suspect i actually "FELL" onto the floor..not moved there. And like i slept less than an hr then mac breakfast came..it's strange how arty stu behave...when xinni called the mac delivery...joyce kept on ask her to ask the person if we were the first oder of the day..hahaha...we are juz weirdoes...think the mac person muz be horrified...anyway..(she said she's not sure if we were the first oder)...oh well...
While i was painting...cosciously and sub consciously...i suddenly heard the darkrm door open...and think cos of my dm habbit...i kind of got this instinct to go and check out who went in...so i went...and IT'S SHEN JIAYI! and...the last person i want to see is him la...cos i never sleep the whole day..i must have looked really horrible!!!! (okay la...i dun look nice even if i sleep 24 hrs a day) but then..still...and ha ha...again he's the ealiest...his exco's lousy...both darkrm manager and the chief photog were not there to arrange for duties today...and no photographers came except the exco...how nice...jy ended up scolding yk at the end...ha ha..anyway...he looked so funny today...and oh yar...ysd he asked me if im gg for their tmr's national day photo outing. And i said no. cos i felt weird. then he said he actually asked other seniors to go as well, like cheefong...junzhan..adi..yar..but diff is diff la..i go there for wad..my photo skills so bad...aiya...they shall have fun man. It's gona be the first ps outing that im not there, ha ha, since last yr, i went for every single outing they had, even those times when i said, im not sure and im not going, in the end, somehow...i always ended up being there with them...but this time...im really really not gg. Good luck to them tmr.
OH YAR! HAD ONE GREAT DISCOVERY TODAY! JIAYI IS ONLY 60 KG! THAT'S REALLY LIGHT!
okie...had lunch with karen at KAP mac...nothing much to say..recently i became closer with karen again..but we ate the lunch in relative silence...only talked a bit about course work...guess we were both too tired...exhuasted and drained...sigh...
slept thr. the entire bus ride...went home..went to cherze's blog and then slept again...wahhh...and im still so super tired...blahhhh
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
somethings are simply irreversible..arent they?
the card that i made for him...yesterday...within 10 min ha ha...pro siah!
For a guy whom. i. like.
世上,如果有抓得住的因缘,就该有放手的因缘,还有,一开始就什么都不是的因缘;你与我,应该属于最后的状况吧...
yesterday was quite a damn day. GP was lousy...but it's no surprise...today's GP is as lousy as ysd's. anyway...joined ps general meeting...and it sucks. The junior batch is really lousy...but sigh...i din really say anything, but then later gq commented on the noticeboard being"very very very very old" and i really cant take it and told him off. I told him that by right the noticeboard should only be changed once a year, and the ps one was changed by si jie and i last yr, so it is not considered too old. And he said something like " i dun care who did it, i only know that it is very old" walau eh...wad the hell. ANd yk went on the say that the black colour was too dull...bla bla bla...and i told him right to his face that "heyz! it ias in black simply bcos it is in camera's shape and cams are black in colour, if u can invent a pink cam i would be more thann happy to draw a pink one!" wad the hell!
bloody ppl
and...i made a card for jy again. To say sorry to have wasted his time the day before his spa and thus indirectly causing him to flop his spa...hope he keeps it well this time...he has a habit of abusing or mistreating the hand made cards that i give him. sigh...
then today...nothing much lor...had SEA hist...revision...and then art theory...mr dio...wahhhhhhhh...chiong arttttttttttt!!!!!!!!!will post my products of tonight later....
but got sth...happened juz now...i saw ian...he went to ar21 to print the inspire certs..and we exchanged a few words...things are juz very awkward btw us now...i think it is impossible for us to return to the past...to find back the old friendship...somethings are just impossible to mend once they are broken...somethings are just irreversible arent they???sigh
For a guy whom. i. like.
世上,如果有抓得住的因缘,就该有放手的因缘,还有,一开始就什么都不是的因缘;你与我,应该属于最后的状况吧...
yesterday was quite a damn day. GP was lousy...but it's no surprise...today's GP is as lousy as ysd's. anyway...joined ps general meeting...and it sucks. The junior batch is really lousy...but sigh...i din really say anything, but then later gq commented on the noticeboard being"very very very very old" and i really cant take it and told him off. I told him that by right the noticeboard should only be changed once a year, and the ps one was changed by si jie and i last yr, so it is not considered too old. And he said something like " i dun care who did it, i only know that it is very old" walau eh...wad the hell. ANd yk went on the say that the black colour was too dull...bla bla bla...and i told him right to his face that "heyz! it ias in black simply bcos it is in camera's shape and cams are black in colour, if u can invent a pink cam i would be more thann happy to draw a pink one!" wad the hell!
bloody ppl
and...i made a card for jy again. To say sorry to have wasted his time the day before his spa and thus indirectly causing him to flop his spa...hope he keeps it well this time...he has a habit of abusing or mistreating the hand made cards that i give him. sigh...
then today...nothing much lor...had SEA hist...revision...and then art theory...mr dio...wahhhhhhhh...chiong arttttttttttt!!!!!!!!!will post my products of tonight later....
but got sth...happened juz now...i saw ian...he went to ar21 to print the inspire certs..and we exchanged a few words...things are juz very awkward btw us now...i think it is impossible for us to return to the past...to find back the old friendship...somethings are just impossible to mend once they are broken...somethings are just irreversible arent they???sigh
Monday, August 06, 2007
finished.
you know wad...i've juz finished my SEA hist SBQ, 6 pages, font 10.5, 4500 words. and i. am. seriously.exhausted.
duno if i shld go school tmr...nono...should be "today"...sigh..i still have to do math now. shit. i wana commit suicide...i should listen to less sad songs....
shit shit shit.
duno if i shld go school tmr...nono...should be "today"...sigh..i still have to do math now. shit. i wana commit suicide...i should listen to less sad songs....
shit shit shit.
Bored...Bored...Bored...hey...Bored leh...
ok...i give up...all the colours are screwed up..i duno why...what the heck...never mind...may be one day i shoukld really paint him in these colours...arhhhh...i still havent finish my hist sbq and it's alr. 3 pages...i cant stop writing!!!!!
ARHHHHHHH!!!!!! why colours like this?????!!!!!!!
this one not very clear lehz...hmmmm
arkkk...fat...too fat...
Heyz! it should be in yellow and orange colour!! why like that?! not my fault...now jy looks like a monster...err...paiseh...
oh well...sigh...i lead a miserable life...
Like yesterday, got dragged out of bed by mum again. But this time it was more drama. At around 830 i kind of heard my mum's voice...then i kind of told her to let me sleep for another 15min...(i use "kind of" is 'cos i dun think i was fully conscious at that time, probably dreaming)...then i continued sleeping until..............................i heard a loud BANG! and felt something hitting my exhausted body...ok...i woke up ( Like DEh!!! how can a human not wake up when...she's being attacked by tons of books????)okay...conclusion: My mum threw all my books and file onto my bed (and me) to wake me up. then she nagged and nagged and nagged...about how late it is (when it's only 930am???!!!!!) and how i've wasted ALL my life sleeping ( so ALL my life only comprises of 1hr?) and how not serious i am in preparing for my coming Alevel and SAT ( so all those hrs of sleep sacrificed for revision are reduced to nothing)...arhhhh!!! i've had had enough of her...endurance~!Patience mo! Patience!!!! it's only a few more months and you shall go overseas...as far away as possible...preferably the other half of the globe...wahhh get rid of her at least for 4 yrs first!!!!...
ok...in the morning i wanted to do international hist SBQ and then realised that it is not as urgent as SEA SBQ...so decided to do SEA instead but din finish either at the end. Now i'm feeling very very insecured for my hist, my SEA hist has deproved a lot...ms oon is simply scary...for this CT i got third highest...in my class for international hist..probably the 5th in the level...but then im like duno where for SEA hist...so when both are combined, i only get a 63% percentile. Im really screwed. Sigh...and im really really bad at SBQ...i like essays better...im so lousy at corroboration, utility and reliability check laz. sigh...god bless me for my hist...
oh...the happy part is that i did art...finally i did it...mum was in a good mood in the aftnoon, and she came in to moniter my revision but then fell in love and became addicted with my computer game..hahaha...then she's too busy to see what i was doing...ha ha...so stupid...i had those games long ago...my cousins installed for me but im naturally not the kind who likes playing computer games...i hate computer games and anime wahahaha...and it's juz how amazing that i fell in love with someone who loves those things. yes...mr shen loves those things. yuck!..err...anyway...again..i din finish any drawings...all are like 3/4 done...think im juz this kind of person...will never succeed because i never liked finishing something....wahhhhh....
Sunday, August 05, 2007
today...
Today is saturday, got dragged out of bed by my mum as early as 830am. I had a really funny and weird dream, but i forgot what it was about... why do people always forget their dreams? this is so stupid. i only remember very few of my dreams, once i dreamt that jiayi wanted to kill me. yeah...errrrrrrr....
The first half of today is really productive, i did the math mock paper, and kept on bothering jensen online to ask him math questions. He's really a patient guy siah...i like typed "power 3 power 4" all those confusing powers...then he also can understand...pro siah...and then later his internet got prob...then he like still bothered to sms me how he did the qns. wow...very responsible...and very funny...when i just finished asking one qn, he said ok, ask me when you meet other problems...then i continued doing and within 5 seconds i had to ask him again...and he was like "wow...so soon got qn already arh!" ha ha ha...oh yeah...he's funny this morning he smsed "Oh forgot to you leh....My church got this blessing thing. You need anything? I will keep you in prayer until the thing you want comes true"...wahh...i was so touched...haha...as in..tot we were not close friends and he wont rmb me... then i asked him to pray for me to get good results for prelim and alevels and also...give me a nice guy. Then he replied "A nice guy ah...So is sincere and good person ok liao izit?"...hahah..yeahyeah..nice and good ok liao..im not greedy...not asking for anything more than these...but he has to like me as much as i like him horz...i've suffered enough from unrequited love...oh well...
like the style of these cards...shld i make something like this for my course work? oh but mr lee want everything to be one style...aiya...suck...
but i wasted the other half of my day looking thr. blogs instead of doing my hist SBQ...i found a touching story written by a singaporean author...it's about this girl who believes that she's being cursed, as in then she can therefore...curse others, so she refrained herself from talking to others. And she has this best friend called landy...but in the end she realised that landy was just an imaginary friend that she created for herself. And the thing that caught my eyes was that the setting is in NJC! and the other major character is a boy called jacky...who kept giving the girl joanna care and concern and tried to help her to get out of her own imaginary world...and recover. But in the end...it's a very sad ending...he got brain tumour...actually this whole story sounds quite cliche...but...the dialogues are very very touching. The boy actually constantly said the same line,"can i hold your hand?" then at one scene is that... the boy and the girl both said something at the same time. He said, "can i hold..." she said at the same time "I..." he said "your..." she said "love..." he said "hand?" she said "you!". both said out the lines at the same time. And then the boy fainted...and later discovered his illness...wahhhhhh....
and....just now when i talked to jiayi...he told me that he screwed up his spa...bad...ralli badly...as in...i felt so so so so so guilty...i shouldnt have wasted his time taking photos of him the previous day...
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
haha
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
i screwed up my spa real bad
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
as in realli bad
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
really?
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
how come?
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
haiz
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
realli screwed up
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
like did the experiment
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
din even draw the graph
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
so i think may get 0
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
or 2 out of 8
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
haiz
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
wah
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
no wonder u dun look happy on fri
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
yeah
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
but still got many more to come
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
i was preoccupied the whole day
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
sorry, haha
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
aiya..
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
ha ha
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
it's ok la
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
everyone will feel bad when they screw up their exams
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
haha
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
and ur one is Alevel spa
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
but still got chance
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
as in
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
nxt time do better lor
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
but then why ?
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
why din even draw the graph?
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
no time?
clear--"It is not abilities that show what we truly are, it is our choices" [Doctors always lie, don't they?] says:
or duno how to do?
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
no time
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
den like
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
my data
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
fly all over the graph paper
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
so was like freaking out
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
my whole body started shaking
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
first time in my life
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
during exam
[jiayi] u asked me not to tell, i didn't says:
haha
Im sorry! duno why...may be he dun blame me but im blaming myself...arhhhhhhhh...im disturbing him!
Saturday, August 04, 2007
studio shots of SHEN JIAYI!
ha ha ha...yesday din have the time to post the pictures...well...here they are...enjoy...:)
oh...by the way...i am super unproductive today...i did nothing much except printing out the photos taken yesterday and doing some experiments on image transfer. It's very very confusing now, i keep telling myself that it's ok, it's ok, it's ok, i can do it, i can finish it, but somehow...a voice at the back of my head is telling me the opposite. I duno...my course work now seems to have geered too much towards him...instead of the theme of "secret" i need to do something...but do what???
and mr lee, he wanted me to show him what i've done so far, so i laid out everything on 2 big tables...then he told me he go and take some paper for wen shu and then will come back to attend me. And the result is, HE NEVER CAME BACK...typical of mr lee...dun think he did it on purpose, he probably forgot about it again...aiyo..sigh...but i also dun really know what to say to him if he did came back...sighz...
and...cheryl says that actually...jiayi is ok with me...except sometimes he thinks that i went overboard...other than that he pretty much enjoys my company....and this morning when i chat with ms chan...i told her that even when im running after him all the time like a stupid cat...he also dun care, then say said something like she thought that it is him who's always loitering around where i reside...and she said like he seems to enjoy me being by his side...no lor...she's imagining things lor...she's making fun of me again...but why am i feeling so happy? he's juz tolerating me and yet i refuse to believe it and im going further and further...testing his patience day by day...ha ha...im so stupid....
oh...by the way...i am super unproductive today...i did nothing much except printing out the photos taken yesterday and doing some experiments on image transfer. It's very very confusing now, i keep telling myself that it's ok, it's ok, it's ok, i can do it, i can finish it, but somehow...a voice at the back of my head is telling me the opposite. I duno...my course work now seems to have geered too much towards him...instead of the theme of "secret" i need to do something...but do what???
and mr lee, he wanted me to show him what i've done so far, so i laid out everything on 2 big tables...then he told me he go and take some paper for wen shu and then will come back to attend me. And the result is, HE NEVER CAME BACK...typical of mr lee...dun think he did it on purpose, he probably forgot about it again...aiyo..sigh...but i also dun really know what to say to him if he did came back...sighz...
and...cheryl says that actually...jiayi is ok with me...except sometimes he thinks that i went overboard...other than that he pretty much enjoys my company....and this morning when i chat with ms chan...i told her that even when im running after him all the time like a stupid cat...he also dun care, then say said something like she thought that it is him who's always loitering around where i reside...and she said like he seems to enjoy me being by his side...no lor...she's imagining things lor...she's making fun of me again...but why am i feeling so happy? he's juz tolerating me and yet i refuse to believe it and im going further and further...testing his patience day by day...ha ha...im so stupid....
Friday, August 03, 2007
Photo shooting...
hoooohooooohahahahaha...today im in good mood i guess...really. ha ha ha
Oh well, not exactly a very very productive day, but i did do something fruitful today. Academic wise, since i finished mr whitby's powm analysis ysd, this morning i had a pretty good time during his lesson...wahhhhh....the feeling of having my hw completed is so so so good!...And i finished Differentiation revision questions with Jensen, ha ah ha...have a sense of accomplishment! Imagine that i was a person who only did 2 tutorials for math for my 1st 3 months in NJ and then later din do any until now...hahahaha...pro siah! I still got B for math lehz...wahhhh...born clever man!:P:P:P:P:P
(by the way, jensen is so funny, he smsed me ysd night" Ah ha...Before i forget...Today is your Birthday izit?"...then i was like "HUH!??"...my bday is 19th march laz...then he "oh...Wow! must have seen something wrongly somewhere...Haha"...hahahaha...blur king...but he's really a nice guy, at least he rmbs my bday in a diff way...i dun blame him cos i never told him my bday and i was not close to him until recently...sigh...he's so nice, give me math tuition 2periods a week, without him i couldn't have gotten B for Math this CT...sigh...how i hope the one that i like is him...too bad, the guy that i like din even rmb my birthday even after i told him many times...oh well...im so used to it...)
PE played soft ball, the ball is so hard la, shall call it "hard ball" myself, got bad experiences of having it hit my head before when i was sec1 in DHS...oh well...but today hongyi say that my catching skill very very good. ha ha...
oh yeah, let mr loh signed my CIP forms..he's so so so so so cute and funny, next year after i graduate then im no longer his "student" then we can be normal friends, ha ha ha, then like years down the road, i can still bully him, and then by that time if i beat him he cant complain anymore...ha ah ha...
then later took photos of Jiayi...today i very happy, so i kept calling him "xiao pang" ha ha...keith put on make up for him...he's extremely reluctant la. and he said it's the first time in nj that he was being put on make up. Even for performances he refused to put on. then he said he sacrificed a lot. hahaha...idiot...but he really looked very cool during the photo taking...hahaha...and we laughed throughout...think he likes cheryl hahaha...cos when i told him i called cheryl to come down to look at his face then he kept saying that he will kill me...and during the photo shooting...he kept secretly looking at her...hahaha..but never mind la, he's a big flirt...not the first day i know him, and cheryl is nice...everyone's nice...haahha...hope he can laugh and smile like this everyday...
Oh well, not exactly a very very productive day, but i did do something fruitful today. Academic wise, since i finished mr whitby's powm analysis ysd, this morning i had a pretty good time during his lesson...wahhhhh....the feeling of having my hw completed is so so so good!...And i finished Differentiation revision questions with Jensen, ha ah ha...have a sense of accomplishment! Imagine that i was a person who only did 2 tutorials for math for my 1st 3 months in NJ and then later din do any until now...hahahaha...pro siah! I still got B for math lehz...wahhhh...born clever man!:P:P:P:P:P
(by the way, jensen is so funny, he smsed me ysd night" Ah ha...Before i forget...Today is your Birthday izit?"...then i was like "HUH!??"...my bday is 19th march laz...then he "oh...Wow! must have seen something wrongly somewhere...Haha"...hahahaha...blur king...but he's really a nice guy, at least he rmbs my bday in a diff way...i dun blame him cos i never told him my bday and i was not close to him until recently...sigh...he's so nice, give me math tuition 2periods a week, without him i couldn't have gotten B for Math this CT...sigh...how i hope the one that i like is him...too bad, the guy that i like din even rmb my birthday even after i told him many times...oh well...im so used to it...)
PE played soft ball, the ball is so hard la, shall call it "hard ball" myself, got bad experiences of having it hit my head before when i was sec1 in DHS...oh well...but today hongyi say that my catching skill very very good. ha ha...
oh yeah, let mr loh signed my CIP forms..he's so so so so so cute and funny, next year after i graduate then im no longer his "student" then we can be normal friends, ha ha ha, then like years down the road, i can still bully him, and then by that time if i beat him he cant complain anymore...ha ah ha...
then later took photos of Jiayi...today i very happy, so i kept calling him "xiao pang" ha ha...keith put on make up for him...he's extremely reluctant la. and he said it's the first time in nj that he was being put on make up. Even for performances he refused to put on. then he said he sacrificed a lot. hahaha...idiot...but he really looked very cool during the photo taking...hahaha...and we laughed throughout...think he likes cheryl hahaha...cos when i told him i called cheryl to come down to look at his face then he kept saying that he will kill me...and during the photo shooting...he kept secretly looking at her...hahaha..but never mind la, he's a big flirt...not the first day i know him, and cheryl is nice...everyone's nice...haahha...hope he can laugh and smile like this everyday...
Thursday, August 02, 2007
feel like im walking in the rain....
today it rained, rained again, im not sure if it is the weather or just me, i've been feeling really emo recently, very not like me. Last time, when i laugh, i will really totaly throw the unhappy things to the back of my head, but now...it seems that those things that trouble me will always manage to linger ard, i cant seem to get rid of them...
it was scheduled that im suppose to take photos of jiayi playing piano and violin today. But then in the afternoon i suddenly lost the feeling of taking the photo. I duno, when i smsed him to ask when he's free, he said after 5pm. And im a little bit unhappy because i did not expect it to be so late, but perhaps he has more important things to do? okay, yeah, heard that he has strings handover ceremony today...oh well, but then when i told him i want keith to put make up on him, he said " the make up part will discuss later can?" oh well... feel so damn sian after that, then after the house session i was sitting in the canteen with karen, and he came, and he put his bag just beside the table that im sitting ,(round tables at the linkway) then he din say hi, so i din say it too, by the time i want to grab him and say something, he went off. ha ha, this is call not fated. Anyway, later xinni and keith both thought that 5+ is too late and so i took the excuse and called jiayi to cancel the shooting. He asked " ok, but hey, what happened?", i said nothing, but duno why i felt like crying. well, sin noe that when im feeling sian, i can feel sad too...then while i was on the bus home, this overwhelming feeling of sadness juz overpowered me...sigh....nono, i din cry, ever since someone called me a "crying baby", i have refrained from crying, no matter how sad i felt...and i think i've became stronger....or...is it? i feel like im walking in the rain, a good song cheryl, exactly what im feeling right now...
oh well, mum is on the phone, quarrelling with my china relatives in china, i wonder why she never cared about the long distance call costs. she like is trying to get my cousin over to singapore, cousin on her side, i dun like all of them. The oldest one is a big flirt, dun like to study, the yonger cousin is useless la, only know how to spend money, a guy who's 19 alr. still dun dare to speak in front of people, his parents paid like not less than 150000 china bucks for his education la, not the sch fee, but the donations to his pri, sec, and high sch. sigh...and the last one, only know how to eat and eat. a whole family of idiots just like my mum herself, proud, arrogant, spendthrift, superficial and well...one good point is that they are all healthy...-_-''' sigh....now my mum want the oldest cousin to come to spore, what the hell la, i dun want! he like will definitely create problems! and his family poorer than mine, and i bet he will live on my mum and dad like leeches! walau eh! he's useless la, cant contribute anything, i dun want to see my parents spending a single cent on him! all those bloody money i rather donate to other poor kids in the village, at least they can use the money to study and do useful things! idiots! and my mum helped him paid a few k sing bucks alr, then now he like trying to cheat, walau eh, complicated, anyway, i hate him, hate my mum's family! and later i bet my mum's gona any find an excuse and scold me cos she not in good mood cos of the stupid cousin! wad the hell! she's on the phone for 2+hrs alr....
arhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
it was scheduled that im suppose to take photos of jiayi playing piano and violin today. But then in the afternoon i suddenly lost the feeling of taking the photo. I duno, when i smsed him to ask when he's free, he said after 5pm. And im a little bit unhappy because i did not expect it to be so late, but perhaps he has more important things to do? okay, yeah, heard that he has strings handover ceremony today...oh well, but then when i told him i want keith to put make up on him, he said " the make up part will discuss later can?" oh well... feel so damn sian after that, then after the house session i was sitting in the canteen with karen, and he came, and he put his bag just beside the table that im sitting ,(round tables at the linkway) then he din say hi, so i din say it too, by the time i want to grab him and say something, he went off. ha ha, this is call not fated. Anyway, later xinni and keith both thought that 5+ is too late and so i took the excuse and called jiayi to cancel the shooting. He asked " ok, but hey, what happened?", i said nothing, but duno why i felt like crying. well, sin noe that when im feeling sian, i can feel sad too...then while i was on the bus home, this overwhelming feeling of sadness juz overpowered me...sigh....nono, i din cry, ever since someone called me a "crying baby", i have refrained from crying, no matter how sad i felt...and i think i've became stronger....or...is it? i feel like im walking in the rain, a good song cheryl, exactly what im feeling right now...
oh well, mum is on the phone, quarrelling with my china relatives in china, i wonder why she never cared about the long distance call costs. she like is trying to get my cousin over to singapore, cousin on her side, i dun like all of them. The oldest one is a big flirt, dun like to study, the yonger cousin is useless la, only know how to spend money, a guy who's 19 alr. still dun dare to speak in front of people, his parents paid like not less than 150000 china bucks for his education la, not the sch fee, but the donations to his pri, sec, and high sch. sigh...and the last one, only know how to eat and eat. a whole family of idiots just like my mum herself, proud, arrogant, spendthrift, superficial and well...one good point is that they are all healthy...-_-''' sigh....now my mum want the oldest cousin to come to spore, what the hell la, i dun want! he like will definitely create problems! and his family poorer than mine, and i bet he will live on my mum and dad like leeches! walau eh! he's useless la, cant contribute anything, i dun want to see my parents spending a single cent on him! all those bloody money i rather donate to other poor kids in the village, at least they can use the money to study and do useful things! idiots! and my mum helped him paid a few k sing bucks alr, then now he like trying to cheat, walau eh, complicated, anyway, i hate him, hate my mum's family! and later i bet my mum's gona any find an excuse and scold me cos she not in good mood cos of the stupid cousin! wad the hell! she's on the phone for 2+hrs alr....
arhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
wahahaha...mon and tues...
yesterday's art was not very progressive, cos he was there for most of the time, i concentrated too much on him. They had exco meeting, and he juz seemed so so so capable, i was happy for having voted for him, even if i dun like him, i will also vote for him, he's so much better than the vice pres, he like list down things one by one and say things in a very concised way. Short and sweet but then right to the point. I love his style...anyway...at the end he reached a point where he said shall be kept within the 4 walls...then i felt so out of place, and then jian hao and i went out of the room. ha ha...oh well...i partly know what he's gona say, but haiya, anyway...he told me abt it when we were at the busstop.
and he was quite worried for cheryl...and asked me again if i had talked to cheryl recently..he was so funny, never seen a more sensitive guy than him, he said that he dun have the habit of initiating conversations with others and esp with girls, cos he scared people will get the wrong signal..like he has some ulterior motives like that...then i was like "huh?"...and then got "thunder strike"...walau eh...when i went home i asked him online...i said sth like "since i always initiate conversations with u online, then does it mean i "an lian" you???!!" ha ha ha...and think u know the ans la, of course he denied la....arhhhh...
then...oh yeah...andrea tan said ms chua will sit in for tmr's gp...and i think i shld not anyhow talk...shall remain silent...ms chua's my lit tcher lehz...and well...juz dun feel like giving andrea tan face...she ruined my gp...
and then today's art...went ard taking photos of myself...got stung by mosquitoes...at least 5 times..:(:(...but hard work was paid off...got quite a few not bad photos...heehee...thanks mab and karen!
oh yar...darkrm air con is fixed! ha ah...but it's so funny...the remote control is still spoilt...so now they have to use a stick to poke the switch button...lucky longhao is tall enough...but ms chan very funny...she like say that jiayi needs to stand on a chair and use a longer stick...wahahahahahaha....
oh well...tmr muz work harder...all tchers are constantly reminding me that prelims is less than 4wks away....
stressssssssssssss!!!!!
and he was quite worried for cheryl...and asked me again if i had talked to cheryl recently..he was so funny, never seen a more sensitive guy than him, he said that he dun have the habit of initiating conversations with others and esp with girls, cos he scared people will get the wrong signal..like he has some ulterior motives like that...then i was like "huh?"...and then got "thunder strike"...walau eh...when i went home i asked him online...i said sth like "since i always initiate conversations with u online, then does it mean i "an lian" you???!!" ha ha ha...and think u know the ans la, of course he denied la....arhhhh...
then...oh yeah...andrea tan said ms chua will sit in for tmr's gp...and i think i shld not anyhow talk...shall remain silent...ms chua's my lit tcher lehz...and well...juz dun feel like giving andrea tan face...she ruined my gp...
and then today's art...went ard taking photos of myself...got stung by mosquitoes...at least 5 times..:(:(...but hard work was paid off...got quite a few not bad photos...heehee...thanks mab and karen!
oh yar...darkrm air con is fixed! ha ah...but it's so funny...the remote control is still spoilt...so now they have to use a stick to poke the switch button...lucky longhao is tall enough...but ms chan very funny...she like say that jiayi needs to stand on a chair and use a longer stick...wahahahahahaha....
oh well...tmr muz work harder...all tchers are constantly reminding me that prelims is less than 4wks away....
stressssssssssssss!!!!!
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